Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Doctors advice us that a healthy diet is sufficient to fulfill the requirements of the body vitamins. Despite knowing this, many individuals continue to spend a large amount of money on vitamin pills. I believe that this is particularly because increased consumption of unhealthy food and vegan diets. To overcome this concern, government should arrange awareness campaigns and increase cost of unhealthy foods.

The main reason for increased uses of vitamins pills is unhealthy diet habits. Nowadays, increasing number of people are rely on junk foods and fast foods. Although they are tasty, it contain a minimal amount of necessary vitamins and ingredients. For example, pizzas and pastas are prepared with more fatty and unhealthy ingredients, which made it necessary for people to take another source of vitamins to fulfill their body requirement. Such food habits lead to deficiency of vitamins and increase consumption of costly pills. Another important reason is people who only consume vegan diet. Vegetarian food doesn't contain appropriate amount of nutritions and vitamins lead to increase deficiency of vitamins. To fulfill their dietary requirements, people more likely to use expensive vitamins pills.

There are several measures could be taken to overcome this issue such as awareness campaigns. Governments can spread awareness of healthy diets and their benefits to people through advertisements and campaigns. At the same time provide education of how unhealthy foods can adversely affect their health. Secondly, increase cost and tax of junk foods can reduce consumption of junk foods. In contrast, reduce the cost of healthy diet can increse uptake of healthy diets with appropriate vitamins.

To conclude, although unhealthy diets are tasty, they contain inappropriate amount of vitamins and fibers lead to increased consumption of costly vitamins pills. Measures such as awaremess campaings and impose tax and reducedcost can improve people's dietary habits.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, discussing both why people spend money on vitamin pills and how they might be persuaded to improve their diet. In the introduction, the writer states that the trend is caused by increased consumption of unhealthy food and vegan diets. The body paragraphs expand on these points, citing fast foods and the nutritional limitations of certain vegetarian diets. The second body paragraph outlines practical persuasive measures such as awareness campaigns and taxation on junk food. However, some ideas are slightly under-developed, and the argument regarding vegan diets contains sweeping generalisations rather than fully supported logical extension. This places the performance firmly at Band 6.0, as all parts are addressed with relevant ideas, but some elements lack depth.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at logical organisation. Paragraphing is utilised correctly to separate the introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'For example', 'Another important reason', 'To begin with', and 'To conclude', although some transitions feel somewhat mechanical or repetitive. Referencing is generally clear, though occasional lapses in pronoun agreement ('which made it necessary') slightly disrupt the flow. The progression of ideas is discernible, moving from causes in the first body paragraph to solutions in the second. These features align well with the Band 6 descriptor, where the overall structure is coherent despite some faulty or mechanical cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'deficiency', 'awareness campaigns', and 'nutritional requirements'. However, there are noticeable lexical and word-choice errors throughout the text, such as 'Doctors advice' instead of 'advise', 'uses of vitamins pills' instead of 'use of vitamin pills', and 'nutritions' instead of 'nutrients'. Spelling and morphological errors ('increse', 'awaremess campaings') occur, though they do not impede overall communication. The writer attempts a varied vocabulary related to diet and health, but frequent inaccuracies in word formation and collocation prevent the score from reaching Band 7.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses, such as 'Although they are tasty, it contain a minimal amount...' and '...unhealthy ingredients, which made it necessary...'. However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are several noticeable errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('it contain', 'diet lead to increase deficiency'), tense inconsistencies ('which made it'), and missing articles or prepositions ('government should arrange', 'increase cost'). Punctuation in the final sentence is also faulty ('imposed tax and reducedcost'). Because these errors are frequent and occasionally cause the reader some difficulty, yet do not prevent the core message from being understood, a Band 5.0 is appropriate.

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