Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.
Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?
How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Although, professionals suggest that all the nutrients needed for our health can be gained from a balanced diet, many individuals perfer vitamin pills spending a huge amount of their budget. It is because people think that the food they consume these days are not organic and getting vitamin suppliments is more conveinent. People can be awared to change their diet by getting organic foods instead of relying on those expensive pills.
Many people use vitamin in order to maintain their diet as from their perspective, the fruits and vegetables they buy from market are grown using a lot of pestisides and insectisides which are not good for health. They believe on the statement from various researchers and go with the easily available suppliments instead. For instance, consumers are affected by the advertisements shown in various media which claims that they are the best alternative to the food they eat and contain certain about of necessary nutrients.
Public can be made awared about the over-consumption of such pills so that they would switch to improving their diet. Many investigations show that using artificial vitamins can lead to serious complication later on. Additionally,the vitamin they consume overtime becomes ineffective with time and they have to eat the organic food in order to remain healthy. For instance, a awareness programme showing the ill effect of such vitamin can help people to change their belief.
In conclusion, even though doctors perfer healthy diet, some people still rely on expensive artifical vitamins because of its convience. They can be persuaded to eat healthy by awaring them with the consequent effects of the pills.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the task, examining both why some people spend money on vitamin pills and how they might be persuaded to improve their diet instead. The student presents a clear position throughout the essay. The reasons provided—such as concerns over pesticides in fresh food and the convenience of supplements—are relevant and supported with explanations and examples, such as the influence of media advertisements. Similarly, the second body paragraph offers valid suggestions for persuasion, including public awareness programmes and highlighting the long-term inefficiency of artificial vitamins. While some ideas could be extended further with deeper examples, the overall coverage meets the criteria for Band 6.5 to 7.0. Given the clear development of both prompt questions, it aligns well with Band 6.5 descriptors.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay presents a clear overall arrangement with a recognizable introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Information and ideas are logically sequenced, progressing from the causes of vitamin pill usage to potential solutions. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate distinct themes. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or slightly faulty, such as the phrase 'It is because' and transitional links that feel a bit repetitive or basic. Referencing is generally clear, but occasional clunky transitions prevent the essay from achieving a higher band. Overall, the organizational structure is sound and maintains logical progression throughout, fitting the Band 6.5 descriptor well.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'nutrients', 'suppliments' (spelling error for supplements), 'pestisides', and 'artificial vitamins'. However, there are noticeable spelling errors ('perfer', 'awared', 'suppliments', 'pestisides', 'insectisides', 'convience') and some awkward word choices ('eating the organic food', 'awaring them'). These lexical errors occasionally distract the reader, though they rarely impede overall communication. The range is minimally sufficient to convey the intended points, but precision and spelling control keep the score at Band 6.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over multi-clause structures (e.g., 'Although, professionals suggest that all the nutrients needed for our health can be gained from a balanced diet, many individuals perfer...'). However, there are frequent grammatical errors and punctuation slips throughout the text, such as unnecessary commas ('Although, professionals'), incorrect verb forms ('the food they consume these days are', 'the vitamin they consume overtime becomes'), and article omissions ('a awareness programme'). While these errors do not severely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent the response from reaching Band 6.5, making Band 6.0 a more accurate reflection.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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