Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Vitamin intake has always been a debatable topic. According to the healthcare experts, we can do it by natural diet but some people still take expensive vitamin pills. In this essay, i will discuss the reasons and also provide suggestion of how they can be turned towards healthy diet.

In today's time everybody is keeping comfort as their only priority. Choosing from buying multiple things from a number of places and buying only one item which is easily available, is not that hard for the people. Vitamins pills are easy to bring on the table compared to the diet. Concequenly, becoming the first choice of people even it is highly priced. A recent survey in the the most vitamin defficit country stats that more than 80 percentage of the people are taking pills for the defficiency as they thinks its time and efforts saving.

However, a natural diet can be a far better way of dealing with the issue. Awareness in the society can be spreaded about the side effects of the pills they are using. Every medicinal substance has some kind of drawbacks attached to its consuption. Heathcare related campaigns should highly focus on the ways of turning people's attention towards the benefits os healthy diet. Many reports suggests that natural diet intake can help in fulfilling multiple nutrients at the same time.

To sum up, people have a comfortless approach and as a result of it they take expensive pills rather than tasteless diet which they have to buy from different locations. But health realated awareness should be broadcasted explaining the unseen benefits of natural food.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, discussing both the reasons why people spend money on vitamin pills and suggesting ways to persuade them to improve their diet. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. The reasons are somewhat general, such as citing convenience and time-saving aspects, and the persuasive strategies rely heavily on awareness campaigns and highlighting side effects. While the ideas are relevant, they could have been extended with more specific examples or personal experiences, as requested by the prompt. Nevertheless, the main parts of the prompt are satisfactorily covered, placing the performance firmly in the Band 6 category.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay is organised into four paragraphs with a clear introduction and conclusion. Ideas are logically sequenced, moving from the reasons for taking pills to solutions involving diet improvement. However, cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or awkwardly used, such as starting a sentence with 'Concequenly, becoming the first choice' without a clear subject, or using 'In today's time'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and paragraphing could be managed more smoothly. Overall organisation is coherent, but the execution of cohesive links points towards Band 6.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common words and phrases such as 'healthcare experts', 'defficiency', and 'medicinal substance'. However, there are numerous spelling errors throughout the response, including 'i' instead of 'I', 'Concequenly', 'defficit', 'defficiency', 'stats', 'thinks its', 'spreaded', 'consuption', 'Heathcare', 'os', 'suggests' (plural agreement), and 'realated'. These lexical errors and spelling mistakes occasionally detract from the reading experience, though communication is not severely impeded, reflecting a Band 5.5 performance.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over sentence structure. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and punctuation slips, such as 'According to the healthcare experts, we can do it by natural diet' (missing object/preposition issues), 'everybody is keeping comfort as their only priority' (awkward phrasing), and sentence fragments like 'Concequenly, becoming the first choice of people even it is highly priced.' Punctuation and article errors recur ('in the the most'). These errors frequently occur across sentences, meaning the text does not fully sustain error-free complex structures, aligning with Band 5.5.

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