Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays, people are spending significant amount of money on consuming vitamin pills. Instead of following advice from the doctors and cooking a meal at home, people are fulfilling the needs with the vitamin pills. In my view, the primary cause of this problem is convenience and the most effective solution is education.

The most significant reason people are spending money on vitamin pills is convenience. People are relying on vitamin pills because the working hours are extended compared to last decade. This is because people could not cook due to lack of time. On the other hand, vitamin pills are tiny and filled with rich vitamins. To fulfil the demand of necessary vitamins, people are consuming these pills every day. For instance, Walmart has noted a 60% increase in the sales of vitamin pills compared to 2016. It is therefore clear that the convenience these pills provide is unmatched.

The most effective solution to this problem is spreading awareness. This could be achieved if the government and leading health institutions such as the World Health Organisation to publish dedicated guidelines on safe consumption. For instance, education institutions should publish easy-to-cook recipes under 20 minutes, which are rich in vitamins such as protein, fiber, and omega-3. If governments and organisations implement this approach, people will start cooking meals at home.

In conclusion, purchasing vitamin pills largely stems from the commitment to longer and exhausting working hours, which invites physical and mental problems in the near future. Governments and individuals should therefore ensure that people should cook meals at home.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt, exploring both why people spend money on vitamin pills (convenience and busy schedules) and how they could be persuaded to improve their diet (education and government guidelines). A clear position is established in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. Ideas are extended and supported with relevant explanations and examples, such as the reference to Walmart sales and the World Health Organisation. However, there is a slight blurring of categories in the final paragraph where 'protein, fiber, and omega-3' are listed as vitamins, which represents a minor factual inaccuracy in the context of diet examples, but overall the task is well covered and the band descriptors for Band 6.5 to 7.0 are met, leaning towards Band 7.0 for clear development.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct central topic: the introduction sets out the thesis, the second body paragraph addresses reasons, the third addresses solutions, and the conclusion summarises the main points. Cohesive devices are used effectively, with transitional phrases like 'On the other hand', 'For instance', and 'In conclusion' guiding the reader smoothly. Paragraphing is used appropriately and sufficiently to separate ideas. Although referencing is occasionally slightly repetitive ('this problem', 'this approach'), the overall structure is coherent and meets the Band 7 criteria for logical organisation and flexible use of cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision, attempting less common items such as 'fulfilling the needs', 'extended compared to last decade', and 'safe consumption'. However, there are some word choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'significant amount of money' (missing an article), 'fulfilling the needs with the vitamin pills', and classifying 'protein, fiber, and omega-3' as vitamins rather than macronutrients or essential nutrients. While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the lexical score from reaching the higher bands. The vocabulary used is adequate and appropriate for a Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, with a good variety of dependent clauses and conditional structures, as seen in 'If governments and organisations implement this approach, people will start cooking meals at home.' There are, however, some noticeable grammatical errors and awkward phrasings, such as the missing article in 'significant amount of money', 'institutions such as the World Health Organisation to publish' (unbalanced infinitive/verb structure), and 'commitment to longer and exhausting working hours, which invites physical and mental problems'. Punctuation and control are generally decent, but the presence of structural inaccuracies places this firmly in the Band 6.0 category, where complex structures are attempted but contain frequent minor flaws.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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