Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Despite doctors guiding people to follow a healthy dietary habits that provides vitamins, individuals are spending their hard earned money on the vitmain pills. Owing to hectic lifestyle, people are not able to maintain a healthy diet; often preferring medicines to fulfil body's nutrition. Persuading people to choose nutrient-rich food over dietary supplements requires shifting public perception from the convenience of a "quick fix" to the tangible benefits of whole nutrition.

People are opting for fast food over homemade cooked food on a daily basis as this is easily available through on-demand platforms. Moreover, preparing homemade cooked food is very time consuming which an individual can not provide due to busy schedule. Therefore, a person chooses supplements to provide essential nutrients to body to remove any physical fatigue. However, this is not beneficial as it cultivates bad habit, which deteriorates one's health over long term.

Certainly, a public mindset towards supplements and fast food should change. This is possible by making people aware of the nutrient rich diet and harmful effects of consuming convenience food. Most people are unaware that supplements do not benefit them unless they opt for a healthy diet that helps them in absorbing the vitmains and minerals. Furthermore, government should organise health campaigns and promote awareness videos on the internet to make citizens aware of the benefits of these distinct food options. Since people spend most of their time in office, a workplace should also promote healthy diet by replacing cold drinks with healthy options like buttermilk and yogurt.

In conclusion, people should prioritise their health by improving their daily habits by choosing a healthy diet instead of relying on supplements. They should concentrate on long term benefits and be aware of the grocery's nutrients they buy for their daily diet. Also, government and private organisation should encourage people to choose healthy food over junk food to allow them to maintain healthy lifestyle.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, examining why people spend money on vitamin pills and suggesting how they could be persuaded to improve their diet. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. The ideas are generally extended and supported, such as explaining how busy schedules and on-demand platforms drive people towards fast food and subsequently to supplements, though there is a slight tendency to over-generalise regarding office workers and workplace changes. To move to a higher band, the development of ideas could be more thoroughly substantiated with deeper analysis or more specific examples, ensuring every point reaches its full potential.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

There is a clear logical organisation and progression throughout the essay. Each paragraph has a distinct central topic, starting with the introduction of the issue, followed by the causes of supplement use, then persuasive measures, and concluding with a summary. Cohesive devices are used flexibly, such as 'Moreover', 'Therefore', 'However', and 'Furthermore', guiding the reader smoothly through the argument. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately. To achieve an even higher level of cohesion, the referencing could be slightly tighter, and the transition between certain sentences could be even more seamless, avoiding any mechanical feel in the logical flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task and attempts less common items such as 'dietary supplements', 'convenience food', and 'nutrient-rich'. However, there are some noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'dietary habits that provides' (agreement error crossing into grammar, but choice of 'vitmain pills' and spelling errors like 'vitmain' and 'grocery's nutrients' indicate lexical limitations). The vocabulary is sufficient for communication, but inaccuracies in word form and choice prevent the response from reaching a higher band. To improve, the writer should focus on precise word formation, correct spelling, and more natural collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses, such as 'Persuading people to choose nutrient-rich food over dietary supplements requires shifting public perception...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing or incorrect articles (e.g., 'fulfil body's nutrition' instead of 'the body's nutrition', 'to body' instead of 'to the body', 'a public mindset'), subject-verb agreement slips ('habits that provides'), and prepositional issues. However, these errors rarely impede communication and the mix of structures shows good foundational control, sitting comfortably above the mid-range threshold.

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