Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is usually advised by doctors to focus on eating a proper nutritious food rather than depending on any vitamins. However, few individuals still invest a lot of money in buying them. This is happening because people are now becoming self-aware of their diet and how it is affecting their body. I believe that governments with the help of doctors can bring this change by shifting people from taking pills to improved diet.

To embark with, people are nowadays more concious about their internal health than ever before. Therefore, they are feeling that their everyday meals are not providing them with the adequate nutrients that are required by their body. So, for them investing huge amounts in buying vitamin pills is the right approach to take care of their health. For instance, after Covid the sales of vitamin C went up as it was considered to be a source of building good immunity to fight any diesease. Hence, some people do not care about spending more when it comes to their health.

On the other hand, this trend needs to be changed as improved eating habits can eradicate the need of any external pills. Governments should regulate policies such as minimizing the advertisements of these vitamins. Instead, the focus should be shifted towards clinics and hospitals, where doctors and other staff members can guide people on how to fulfil all their nutrients from the diet that they eat. For example, a balanced diet chart can be made for each individual considering their age, gender and weight. Thus, this can reduce the consumption of these medications.

To recapitulate, it can be concluded that despite of doctors educating people on how they can fulfil their daily vitamins from their own diet, they prefer taking vitamins. This is because people are taking extra care of themselves and do not mind spending more when it comes to their health. Local authorities can focus on reducing advertisements which promote these pills and medical centres should give guidance on how to complete this need from the daily food.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt, exploring both why people spend money on vitamins and how they could be persuaded to improve their diet. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. However, some ideas are slightly under-developed rather than fully extended. For instance, the discussion on how governments can regulate policies and reduce advertisements is somewhat brief and could have benefited from a more elaborated example beyond mentioning diet charts. The transition towards the higher band would require deeper exploration of the underlying psychological drivers of consumers and more sophisticated policy proposals regarding nutritional education.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with clear paragraphing, dedicating distinct paragraphs to the introduction, the two prompt questions, and the conclusion. Progression is generally logical, guiding the reader smoothly through the writer's arguments. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'To embark with', 'Therefore', and 'On the other hand', but some of these transitional phrases are slightly mechanical or unidiomatic, which holds the cohesion back from higher levels. To achieve a higher band, the referencing within sentences needs to be more seamless, and the integration of cohesive devices should feel entirely natural and less formulaic.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to communicate their ideas clearly regarding health and nutrition. There are attempts to use less common lexical items, such as 'eradicate', 'adequate nutrients', and 'immunity', showing an ambition to expand the lexical range. However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'proper nutritious food' instead of 'proper nutritious food' or just 'nutritious food', and 'fulfill all their nutrients' instead of 'meet their nutritional needs'. Spelling and word formation are generally fine, but to reach the next band, a wider range of sophisticated vocabulary needs to be used with greater precision and stylistic awareness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and conditional ideas reasonably well, as seen in structures like 'where doctors and other staff members can guide people'. There are some grammatical errors present, particularly with articles and prepositions within grammatical patterns, such as 'focus on eating a proper nutritious food' (unnecessary article) and 'despite of doctors educating' (incorrect prepositional structure). Nevertheless, these errors rarely impede communication and the meaning remains clear throughout. To move further up, the essay would need a greater frequency of error-free complex sentences and finer control over article usage.

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