Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.
Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?
How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
To start with,eating a healthy food is very essential for every individual becouse it provide us lots of vitamins,calcium and many more benefits and provide us healthy lifestyle. According To my perspective.every human being should prefer health food instead of junk food. I am going to discussed some reasons with an appropriate example in the upcomming paragraph.
In this modern era,most of the living being givie priority to unhealthy eatables rather than healthy Infact they choose a easy way to intake vitamins. in some words they mostly dependon vitamin pills. very they obssesed with street food.
to cite an example, in canada most of human beings have a hectic schedule so they have time to take proper diet so they choose easy way to stay active by intaking vitamin pills.
On the other paradoxical side,there is the best ways to avoid buying a vitamin pills. first of all, in school teacher should teacher student about the benefits of healthy food. like homemade eatables provide lots of nutriuents, vitamins,calciums to our body and also protect us from lots of troubles with deseases. for example.we can learn about our body from sc
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response responds to the task only minimally and fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 250 words, stopping abruptly at 190 words. While the writer attempts to address both parts of the prompt—discussing why people spend money on pills and how they could be persuaded to improve their diet—the ideas remain extremely limited and underdeveloped. For instance, the mention of Canadians having a hectic schedule is stated simply without any extension or clear support. Furthermore, the response trails off incompletely at the end, preventing any full exploration of the prompt's requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
Information and ideas are not arranged coherently throughout the text. While the writer uses basic transitional phrases such as To start with and In this modern era, the overall logical progression is frequently disrupted by fragmented sentences and an incomplete conclusion that abruptly ends mid-sentence. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks clear relationships between sentences. Referencing is also weak, making it difficult to follow the progression of ideas, such as moving from the reasons for buying pills directly to educational solutions without adequate signposting.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, utilizing everyday terms like healthy food, junk food, and vitamin pills. There are noticeable lexical errors and word-choice issues, such as health food instead of healthy food, and living being instead of people or individuals. Spelling mistakes also occur frequently, including becouse, upcomming, givie, eatables, dependon, obssesed, nutriuents, and deseases. These inaccuracies and the limited range strain the reader and reflect a restricted vocabulary suitable only for basic communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The grammatical range is very limited, relying heavily on simple structures with frequent errors that distort meaning. There is a lack of control over basic sentence forms, accompanied by persistent errors in punctuation, spacing, and subject-verb agreement, such as eating a healthy food is and teacher should teacher student. Articles and prepositions are frequently misused or omitted entirely, as seen in have time to take proper diet instead of the time to take a proper diet. Additionally, run-on sentences and punctuation failures, such as missing spaces after periods and commas, are common throughout the text.
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