Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It has been generally advised by doctors that the vitamin deficiencies can be fulfilled by having nutritious home-made meals. Despite this advice, numerous people are seen investing hefty amounts of money on purchasing vitamin tablets. This essay intends to discuss the underlying factors behind this scenario along the possible solutions to this widespread problem.

In this age of hectic schedules, people are too occupied in work to get sufficient time to prepare healthy and delicious food for them as well as their family. As it is well known that preparing meals to meet specific health goals need research first and the required time to cook these items which seems impossible to get these days. With no option left, individuals become forced to shift to ready-made options such as vitamin pills, protien supplements and many more.The excessive reliance on these pills seems effortless because of easy availability and accessibility in the market. Moreover, the citizens who have enough time and desire to cook these healthy meals themselves, have to face the market which is full of contaminated food. For example, what will a person do if he is too dedicated to prepare healthy meals but the raw material such as cottage cheese and milk is completely man-made and full of chemicals? This,in turn, leads to people shifting to branded supplements and pills in order to have required vitamins.

To every deadly problem, there is a viable solution to some extent at least. First and foremost, inhabitants need to think twice about their health and even financial goals; therefore, by maintaining a work-life balance, workers have to dedicate a certain amount of time of their day to prepare quality meals for them. The key point is to get healthy forms of nutrition while refraining from putting pressure on pockets. In this way, the family members will not only get the dedicated vitamins but the other forms of nutrition such as protiens, carbohydrates, fats in the desired calories and balanced manner as well. Furthermore, the remedial action to contaminated food lies in getting foods from trustable companies which are regulated by FSSAI, for example. I have witnessed people purchasing cottage cheese from locals shops and get deceited which further plunges them to a cycle of trust loop. Consequently, mindfully purchasing raw materials and preparing healthy dishes for them can help them abstain from vitamin pills, further saving large sums of money.

To encapsulate, while citizens these days like to prefer easily availbale choices in market in form of vitamin tablets, they can be persuaded to ameliorate their diet, if addressed meticulously.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the reasons why people spend money on vitamin pills and suggesting how they could be persuaded to improve their diet. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. Ideas are generally extended and supported, such as when explaining the time constraints of busy schedules and the issue of food contamination with the cottage cheese example. However, there is a slight tendency to over-generalize in certain arguments, such as assuming raw materials are universally man-made and full of chemicals, which places the task response firmly at this level rather than higher.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay demonstrates a clear logical organization and progression throughout. Information and ideas are coherently linked, with distinct paragraphs serving their respective functions well. Cohesive devices are used reasonably flexibly, such as 'Despite this advice', 'In this age of hectic schedules', and 'First and foremost'. While paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, referencing is occasionally slightly mechanical or repetitive, such as the frequent reliance on pronouns like 'them' and 'they', which prevents the cohesion from achieving a more fluid and sophisticated progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The writer uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items with varying degrees of success, such as 'hefty amounts', 'underlying factors', 'remedial action', and 'ameliorate'. However, there are some word choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'get deceited' instead of 'get deceived', 'cycle of trust loop', and minor spelling slips like 'availbale' and 'protien'. These lexical errors do not impede communication, but they occur frequently enough to keep the lexical score at this level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

There is a mix of simple and complex sentence forms utilized throughout the response, showing an attempt at varied structures like conditional and relative clauses. Some complex structures are occasionally faulty, such as 'the vitamin deficiencies can be fulfilled by' or 'discuss the underlying factors behind this scenario along the possible solutions'. Other minor grammatical errors involve prepositions and article usage, such as 'from locals shops' and 'in form of vitamin tablets'. Nonetheless, these errors are relatively infrequent and rarely impede communication, allowing the text to read quite smoothly.

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