Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is vividly informed by the doctors that consuming a healthy diet will provide you with essential vitamins. While some prefer to spend money on vitamin pills which I believe is not a better solution. There are multiple reasons for this decision and I will elaborate those along with the possible options in the forthcoming paragraphs.

To begin with, technology plays an invaluable role in the additional knowledge of these medical supplements. People spend their plenty of time on internet nowadays in search of easiest ways to gain all the complementary vitamins required for our body. As a result, they ends up spending large sums of money on vitamin tablets. Also, many individuals spend their most of the time at work; to maintain a healthy diet, they consume these supplements.

In order to persuade this pattern, government needs to take mendatory legal steps on the marketing of these tablets because advertisements are creating confusion among people. It would be an exemplary solution if comminities take initiatives to organise continous camps to motivate youth to improve diet rather than following the medical supplements. Moreover, schools should teach students about the benefits of a natural diet, as it is quite easier to nurture the kids at the earliest age.

Based on the aforementioned reasoning, it is understandable that everybody is looking for a short-cut. However, in order achieve all the necessary vitamins for our body, we need to follow healthy diet whether non-vegetarian or vegan. These supplements contains harmful acids and salt contents which are highly toxic for our liver and kidneys.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by identifying why people buy vitamin pills and suggesting ways to persuade them to improve their diet instead. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. The reasons for spending money on supplements, such as internet influence and busy work schedules, are mentioned but lack deeper extension. Similarly, the solutions proposed in the third paragraph, including government legal steps and community camps, are introduced rather broadly without concrete examples. The writer establishes a clear position throughout, but a more thorough exploration of both prompt questions would lift this response further.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression of ideas. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, the reasons, the solutions, and the conclusion. Cohesive devices are generally present, such as 'To begin with', 'As a result', and 'Moreover', showing that the writing holds together well. However, some elements of cohesion are a bit mechanical, and referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the pronoun use in 'To persuade this pattern', which prevents the cohesion from being entirely smooth or sophisticated. It successfully meets the criteria for a solid organizational structure while showing initial steps toward more seamless paragraph linking.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'complementary vitamins', 'invaluable role', and 'nurture the kids'. However, there are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word form throughout the text. For instance, phrases like 'vividly informed' and 'spend their plenty of time' are unnatural, and words like 'mendatory', 'continual', and 'ends up' contain minor errors or incorrect pluralisation. While these lexical slips and awkward collocations do not severely impede communication, they restrict the vocabulary score by appearing frequently and lacking the precision needed for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional and relative clauses. There are several grammar and punctuation errors present, including subject-verb agreement issues ('this supplements contains'), article omissions ('follow healthy diet'), and awkward prepositional phrases ('at the earliest age'). However, these errors rarely impede communication, and the meaning of the sentences remains clear to the reader. To achieve a higher band, the writer would need to demonstrate greater control over complex sentence patterns and significantly reduce the frequency of basic grammatical slips.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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