Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Doctors said that the best formula to stay healthy is to take balance diet. In contrast, some people ignore the guidance given by doctors and focus on consuming vitamin pills. This essay will examine the reasons for taking pills, which are busy schedule and influence by advertisemnet. It will also suggest the ways to tackle this daunting situation , which could possibly be work-life balance and advice from nutritionist.

To commence with, to meet the competetive market demands people are engaged in doing overtime work. Many people who want to retain their position in company even work after working hours. Therefore, they get rare time to cook for themselves and eat mostly processed food. When their body feel weak , they decide to take vitamin pills themselves to recover their energy. Furthermore, some advertisements related to supplements on social media and television puts a great impact on an individuals mind. They convience their customers by telling their benefits and also about their side effects. They even hire famous celebrities to convenince teh public with their product. Thus, the influence is so strong that consumers become ready to spend a lot of money on vitamin pills. For example, Sehnaaz gill an indian actress promote Vitamin C pills and her fans buy these pills believing her to be the best product available in market.

This situation could be resolved when a person sticks to his diet plan. There should be a work life balance, where a person gets time to cook a healthy diet for him. People should wake up early to make home made food, if they are planning to stay overnight to work in office. Thus, an individual will never feel deficiency of vitamin in his body. Apart from this, a person needs to take advice from Nutritionist. The person should meet the professional person who makes diet plan, in case he gets confused after watching advertisements. Nutritionist will helps them to set their diet plan according to their time. They would also tell them which nutrients and proteins to include in diet. Consequently, this would save time and money which is often spend on collecting various amount of Vitamin pills.

To conclude, although vitamin pills are crucial for body to remain healthy, the drawbacks of consuming pills are more than its benefits. The people take pills when they do not have time to cook or are completely influenced by advertsiment. However, this may be solved by the concept of work-life balance and hiring a professional person who helps to make a good diet plan.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both questions and maintain a clear overall position: lack of time and advertising help explain purchases, while better work-life balance and nutritionist advice are proposed as alternatives. The example of a celebrity promoting vitamin C pills supports the advertising point, and the discussion of overtime explains why some people may choose supplements. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. The claim that a person who follows a diet plan will “never feel deficiency” is too absolute and needs qualification; likewise, the practical advice to wake up early is not explored in relation to people’s differing schedules. To strengthen the response, explain more precisely how reliable dietary guidance or public information could persuade people to change their habits.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for causes and solutions, and a conclusion. The progression from work pressures to advertising is easy to follow, and signposts such as “Furthermore,” “Apart from this,” and “To conclude” help guide the reader. Some linking is mechanical, however: “To commence with” and “Consequently” announce relationships rather than always making them clear through the ideas themselves. There are also moments where reference is vague, such as “This situation” and “They” in the nutritionist discussion. For stronger progression, connect each proposed solution directly to the cause it addresses and use clearer references instead of relying on repeated transition phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “processed food,” “supplements,” “advertisements,” “nutrients,” and “diet plan.” There are also attempts at more formal expressions, such as “competitive market demands” and “daunting situation.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “take balance diet,” “puts a great impact,” and “feel deficiency of vitamin” do not express the intended ideas naturally. Spelling errors such as “advertisemet,” “convience,” and “competetive” are noticeable, and some wording is repetitive, particularly “person” and “pills.” Build accuracy by learning common word partnerships and checking spelling, while choosing simpler phrasing when unsure.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “When,” “if,” and “although,” and most of the argument remains understandable. However, errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction recur. For example, “some advertisements … puts” should use a plural verb, while “Nutritionist will helps them” combines an incorrect verb form with a missing article or plural. In “When their body feel weak,” the subject and verb do not agree, and “a person sticks to his diet plan” shifts awkwardly from the general plural “people.” Review subject–verb agreement, articles, and verb patterns, then proofread each sentence. More accurate control of these forms would make your varied sentence structures clearer.

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