Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Many people spends significant amount of money on vitamin pills. However, doctors advice us that with a healthy diet we get all the vitamins required for us. This essay will discuss both questions and discribes why people spend more money on pills and how people be persuaded to improve thier diet rather than buying these.

One major reason is some people have little or no time to make healthy food, so they prefer to eat fast food because it is more convenient. People assumes to take vitamin, pills are the quick solution. For instance, working person spend his whole day at office and have no much time to prepare healthy meal at home, so he eat fastvfood and pick pills for vitamin. Furthermore, social media plays a vital role to influnce people to take vitamin pills. Different influncers convince them that these pills are healthy for life. Companies sell their products in reasonable price and people spend more money to buy them.

Nevertheless, people could be persuaded to improve their diet rather than buying vitamin pills. It can be done by several ways. Firslty, governmnets should raise awareness through social media to convince people to eat healthy diet. Schools and other institutes should educate childrens to balance their diet and explain them the benefits of natural food. Secondly, governments should take action to control the prices of natural products and influnce people to make their healthy food at home. For example, if the natural prices are affordable, people automatically buy natural and make healthy meals at home.

In conclusion, people spend huge amount of money on vitamin pills because they have little time, so they think these are the quick solution. Nonetheless, we should convince people to eat healthy meals at home rather than wasting money on different vitamin products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question and maintain a relevant focus. For the first part, you identify lack of time, convenience and social-media influence as reasons people buy supplements; for the second, you suggest awareness campaigns, school education and making natural foods affordable. These are appropriate ideas, but some are less fully explained than others. The example of an office worker illustrates the time issue, while the claims about influencers and government action receive little supporting detail. The suggestion to control prices also needs clearer explanation of how this would change buying habits. To strengthen the response, develop each main point with a specific explanation or example and make the link between the proposed action and improved diets explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, one paragraph on reasons, one on solutions and a conclusion. The sequence within the body paragraphs is generally easy to follow, and signposts such as “Furthermore,” “Nevertheless” and “Secondly” help readers recognise shifts between ideas. This coherent structure meets the lower-band expectations and shows some features of stronger progression. However, the linking can feel mechanical, particularly with “It can be done by several ways” followed by “Firstly” and “Secondly.” Some references are also unclear, such as “these” in the introduction and “these are the quick solution” in the conclusion. Use more precise references and connect explanations directly to the point they support.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “vitamin pills,” “healthy diet,” “raise awareness” and “natural food.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “plays a vital role” and “affordable.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation and spelling problems make the writing less natural: “people assumes to take vitamin pills,” “in reasonable price,” and “natural prices” are unclear or awkward. Spelling errors such as “influnce,” “Firslty” and “governmnets” are noticeable. Build a more accurate set of phrases for discussing supplements, food costs and public education, and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a reason clause (“because it is more convenient”) and a conditional example (“if the natural prices are affordable…”). The main message is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors occur across the response. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “Many people spends” and “People assumes”; verb forms are also inaccurate in “how people be persuaded” and “working person spend.” Articles and plurals need attention, as in “a healthy diet,” “healthy meal” and “educate childrens.” These errors do not usually prevent the reader from following your ideas, but they reduce accuracy. Practise checking agreement, verb forms and article use, while varying sentence patterns and proofreading each sentence.

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