Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is commonly seen that people spend money on vitamin supplements. However, doctors advised sveral times that a healthy diet contains every necessary vitamins. I believe individuals spend funds on vitamin pills beacuse of influence of advertisements. In the following paragraphs, this essay will examine how advisements influence people to buy vitamin pills, and how the government can encourage people to improve their diets instead to purchasing pills.

Many large supplement organizations run ads on TV and social media platforms to promote their products. Sometimes these companies hire influential personalities to capture a large audience. This is because when people see reknowned personlities promoting products such as vitmamin pills, they tend to purchase them. For instance, a famous singer can easily influence their fans to buy things through advertisements. This how organizations attracts many customers to buy their products.

To address this, by investing in health awareness campaigns, governments can encourage people to eat a healthy food to fulfill their vitamin requirements. The more people having a healthy diet, the less they are likely to spend on health supplements. If the government start encouraging individuals to focus on healthy food, people would shift their focus from vitamins pills to nuturious diet. For example, many people can start prioritzing healthy eating habits after knowing that they can get vitamins from having a healthy balanced diet.

In conclusion, influence of advertisements is the major reason why people spend large sums of money on vitamins pills. By investing money in awareness programs the governments can persuade people to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin supplements.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both questions and maintain a clear central explanation: advertising, especially through celebrities, encourages purchases, while government awareness campaigns could promote healthier eating. The examples of a singer influencing fans and people changing habits after learning about dietary sources are relevant. However, the ideas remain general and are not developed enough to fully explain why people spend large sums—for example, you could discuss convenience, perceived deficiencies, or distrust of ordinary food. The proposed campaigns also need more detail about how they would persuade people or reach them. The response therefore covers the task, but some points are only briefly supported. The stated length requirement is met.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph explaining advertising, one proposing a solution, and a conclusion that restates the main points. The progression is easy to follow, and signposts such as “To address this” help distinguish the solution from the cause. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some control of progression. However, links between ideas are occasionally mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “people” and “buy,” and “This how organizations attracts many customers” does not clearly connect the example to its conclusion. Develop each paragraph through a more explicit sequence of claim, explanation, and consequence, and vary referencing and transitions to make cohesion more flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “vitamin supplements,” “health awareness campaigns,” “influence,” and “balanced diet,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “influential personalities.” However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling and word-choice errors weaken precision: “advisements” is used where “advertisements” is intended, and “nuturious diet” is misspelled. Phrases such as “healthy food” and “vitamin pills” recur, while “spend funds” sounds less natural than “spend money.” Build a wider set of accurate collocations for nutrition and consumer behaviour, and proofread spelling carefully; these changes would make the vocabulary more precise and fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple sentences and longer structures, including the conditional “If the government start encouraging individuals… people would shift…” and the comparative construction “The more people having a healthy diet, the less they are likely…”. These attempts show some range, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction are frequent enough to affect accuracy. For example, “doctors advised” does not fit the general present-time claim, “every necessary vitamins” has a number-agreement problem, and “This how organizations attracts” is missing a verb and has incorrect agreement. The comparative sentence also needs a finite verb after “people.” Practise checking subject–verb agreement and complete clause structure, while retaining complex sentences only when their grammar is controlled.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.