Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent times, by adapting a healthy lifestyle and diet we can get all the required vitamins.While, Some individuals still prefer to spend large amount on these pills. However, Social media influence plays a vital role in normalizing it. while,some actions by officials can reduce it to a certain extent.

The reason that why people spend money on vitamins is because of social media influence. Nowadays, younger generation is following every new trend without proper knowldege. For example, some famous celebrities promote sponsored non reliable pharmaceutical products on different platforms like vitamin gummies, glutathione iv drips and collagen medicines.It attracts large female audience and target them more. As a result, spending on these pills is increased. Furthermore, lack of knowledge or no knowledge at all also contributes to some extent because they also show the fake after results to make them believe that their appearance can be better after using those products.

A strict actions by government official can play a crucial role in its reduction by focuing on improving diet instead of buying these pills. However, Campaigns by doctors on monthly basis to educate people about the importance of healthy eating and this issue are required. For instance, not allowing children to buy any pharma product without priscription. Although It can not complete remove it, some action is better than no action. Big celebritries on tv can help by giving awareness about it. Podcast and talk shows regarding natural diet that can acts as a health booster can make people understand its effect in old age.

In conclusion, instead of relying on food and good lifestyle people are still wasting their money on supplements due to strong social media influence and trends which people are following blindly and it can be improved by powerful actions of officials by giving awareness on it.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both questions and maintain a relevant position: social-media promotion and limited knowledge help explain purchases, while education and official action are proposed as alternatives. The examples of celebrity endorsements and campaigns by doctors make the response more specific. However, the explanation of why people buy supplements is more developed than the proposed solutions. For instance, the suggestion that children should not buy pharmaceutical products without a prescription is not clearly connected to improving adults’ diets, and the role of government action remains general. The conclusion restates the main points but does not add a final insight. To strengthen the response, explain how each proposed measure would change people’s choices and support it with a more directly relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for causes and solutions, and a conclusion. This makes the main line of argument easy to follow. You also use linking expressions such as “For example,” “Furthermore,” and “As a result” to show relationships between ideas. At times, however, connections are mechanical or unclear. The opening uses “While” and “However” in ways that do not establish a clear contrast, and the shift from government action to children’s prescriptions and then celebrity awareness is abrupt. Some references, such as “it” in “Although it cannot completely remove it,” are difficult to interpret. Use fewer formulaic transitions and make the relationship between each solution and the problem explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary for health and promotion, including “sponsored,” “pharmaceutical products,” “social media influence,” and “healthy eating.” These choices help communicate the topic, and some less common terms add specificity. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “large female audience,” “fake after results,” and “health booster.” Spelling errors, including “knowldege,” “focuing,” and “priscription,” also reduce precision. Some wording is repetitive, particularly the repeated references to “pills,” “people,” and “influence.” Aim for more natural collocations and check spelling carefully; for example, “a large female audience” and “misleading results” would express your intended meanings more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a reason clause (“The reason … is because…”) and a conditional-style proposal (“not allowing children to buy…”). The overall meaning is generally understandable, but errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation are noticeable. For example, “A strict actions” has a number mismatch, while “younger generation is following” needs clearer article and agreement control. The opening also joins sentences without a space and uses “While” as an incomplete transition. Some long sentences, such as the one beginning “Furthermore, lack of knowledge,” would be clearer if divided or carefully punctuated. Practise building accurate complex sentences and check sentence boundaries, articles, and singular/plural agreement.

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