Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.
Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?
How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Physicians and Nutritionists have been telling us that one may get the essential vitamins and minerals through a balanced diet. Considering the above fact, some people still choose to spend large amounts of money on vitamin tablets. This is because they believe pills have an accurate form of vitamins and minerals. However, health institutes may educate people to improve their eating habits rather than spending on pills.
To begin, people spend on these supplements as they think that companies are making these in accurate and pure form. Therefore, they rely on these companies' branding and advertisement which highlights the benefits of these tablets on health. Secondly, I personally observed that people want to have a strong and healthy body, and they spend on these supplements to get the results. Thus, companies attract more customers by digital ads, sponsorships and through other means of media. Ultimately, this attracts more people to buy these pills.
However, governments may mitigate this rising trend by introducing food campaigns and seminars with the help of diet specialists in order to improve the eating habits of the general public. They may choose schools, Universities and community centers for these above events. Particularly, a diet plan should be appealing and engage people attention so they may prefer to eat organic substances to meet their vitamin needs. Government should allocate a yearly budget for these seminars, and a committee should regulate this whole exercise to make this impactful. In schools, teachers may educate students to get essential vitamins through fruits and vegetables. In this way, they will learn this in an early age.
To conclude, people think that pharma companies are supplying the rich form of vitamins. That is why they are tend to buy these pills. However, the government may start awareness programs to tackle this rising trend, and make them believe that organic food can fulfil all their vitamin needs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response addresses both questions and maintains a clear overall position: people are influenced by perceived product quality and advertising, while public education could encourage healthier eating. The explanation of advertising is relevant, and the proposals involving schools, community centres, diet specialists and teachers give the second part useful detail. This meets the core requirements well. However, some ideas are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the claim that people believe supplements are “accurate and pure” could be developed by explaining why they trust pills or what makes them seem more convenient than food. The suggestion that a diet plan should be appealing is also not made concrete. More specific examples and fuller links between causes and solutions would strengthen the response further.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph explaining why people buy supplements, a paragraph proposing ways to change behaviour, and a conclusion. The progression is generally easy to follow, and signposts such as “To begin,” “Secondly,” and “However” help identify the stages of the argument. Some cohesion is mechanical, though, with several sentences beginning with linking expressions such as “Therefore,” “Thus,” and “Ultimately.” The relationship between the claim about companies’ branding and the later point about wanting a strong body could also be connected more explicitly. References such as “these above events” are not fully clear or natural. Use a wider range of links between cause, example and consequence, and make references precise.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
There is an adequate range for discussing health and public education, including “balanced diet,” “supplements,” “eating habits,” “diet specialists,” and “awareness programs.” The writer also attempts more formal vocabulary, such as “mitigate” and “allocate,” and the meaning is generally clear. However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural: “accurate form of vitamins,” “rich form of vitamins,” “organic substances,” and “engage people attention” do not express the intended ideas precisely. “Pharma companies” is also less suitable here than a more standard phrase such as “pharmaceutical companies.” Greater control of natural collocations and more precise wording would make the argument sound more fluent and convincing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses with “as,” “which,” and “so,” and most sentences remain understandable. There are some grammatical errors, but they rarely prevent the reader from following the argument. For example, “they are tend to buy” should be “they tend to buy,” and “engage people attention” needs a possessive form: “engage people’s attention.” The phrase “learn this in an early age” also has an article and preposition problem; “learn this at an early age” is more accurate. Review subject–verb patterns, articles and possessives, and check punctuation and spacing around commas. More consistently accurate complex sentences would improve control.
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