Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.
Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?
How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In today's fast-paced lifestyle, it is important to stay healthy. Many doctors believe that if people consume healthy food, they will get enough nutritions and vitamins. There are still many individuals who spend huge money on Vitamins pills to stay healthy and more energetic. This essay explains why people choose to spend money on vitamins pills and how people encouraged to improve their diet insted of buying pills.
To begin with, every person's body differ from the other. There are some reasons like people who do not consume meat due to their religious beliefs cannot get enough vitamins. For example, In India people from Brahmin class do not consume meat or chicken so they lack Vitamin B12. Moreover, their last option is to complete those vitamins in their body by consuming vitamin pills.
Furthermore, people can be motivated to eat healthy foods to get enough vitamins rather than buying vitamin pills. To illustrate, there are several green leafy vegetables which help to provide all the essential vitamins in a human body. A person should daily eat fruits like oranges, apples and many more to get vitamins. Similarly oranges can help to provide enough vitamin C instead of buying vitamin C pills.
In conclusion, healthy diet fulfill all the vitamins in a human body. Eating more home-made food and raw food provide all the necessary vitamins and nutritions. Whereas, some people have some food restrictions so that they have to take vitamin pills to get enough vitamins in their body. People who can consume any food should avoid spending huge money on vitamin pills and eat more natural foods.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You address both questions and maintain a relevant focus on diet and supplements. The explanation that some people avoid meat for religious reasons, followed by the example of Brahmins in India and vitamin B12, gives one specific reason for buying pills. However, this is the only developed explanation of why people spend large sums; other possible motivations, such as convenience or believing supplements are more effective, are not explored. The advice about vegetables and fruit is relevant, but it mainly lists foods rather than explaining how people could be persuaded to choose them—for example, through clearer public health guidance or practical support. Develop both causes and persuasion methods more fully, and make the link between each example and the question explicit.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two main areas, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the structure, and the examples generally appear beside the points they illustrate. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some control of progression. However, the paragraph about improving diets gives food examples without developing a clear persuasion strategy, so the connection to the question is less direct. Some linking is also mechanical, and “Similarly” introduces an example that largely repeats the preceding point about fruit. Use transitions to show relationships between ideas, and build each paragraph around a distinct, fully explained point.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use enough topic vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “healthy diet,” “religious beliefs,” “essential vitamins,” and “food restrictions.” These terms are relevant, and the examples make the subject clear. However, the range is limited by repeated use of “vitamins,” “healthy,” and “people,” while several noticeable word-choice, form, and spelling errors reduce precision: “huge money,” “nutritions,” “Vitamins pills,” and “insted.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “complete those vitamins in their body.” Aim for more precise collocations and vary repeated terms—for instance, use “spend large sums,” “nutrients,” and “make up for a deficiency.” Proofreading spelling and capitalisation would also improve control.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional opening (“if people consume healthy food”) and a relative clause (“vegetables which help to provide…”). The overall meaning is usually understandable, but errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction occur often enough to affect accuracy. Examples include “every person's body differ,” “how people encouraged,” and “healthy diet fulfill”; these need forms such as “bodies differ,” “how people can be encouraged,” and “a healthy diet fulfils.” The sentence beginning “Whereas” is also a fragment because it lacks a main clause. Practise checking subject–verb agreement and complete sentence structure, while retaining a mix of simple and complex sentences.
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