Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Practitioners advise us that a balanced diet comprises all the necessary vitamins needed for humans; however, some individuals still spend a considerable amount of money on buying vitamin tablets. I strongly believe this is due to a lack of public awareness and accessibility of such pills in drugstores. People should be encouraged to improve their diet by adopting a healthy diet, and the government should impose laws against buying vitamins unnecessarily.

People often spend large sums of their salaries on multivitamins. This is largely because pharmaceutical companies publicise the importance of drugs such as vitamin and iron pills by advertising them on social media. Additionally, ordinary people do not do thorough research on what they are purchasing and just follow the ongoing trends. For instance, the general public lacks proper guidance on the harmful effects of unsupervised intake of medications, which results in detrimental consequences.

That being said, both individuals and the government need to work together towards changing the regular diet into a healthy one. This is possible when people are aware of the side effects of vitamins and other drugs, which can be done via educational institutions and social media. The government should regulate stricter laws on buying unnecessary pills from pharmacies without a doctor's prescription. They should also ban advertisements that portray how strength-enhancing pills are mandatory for everyone.

In conclusion, some individuals spend a lot of money on vitamin pills because major pharmaceutical organizations advertise their products to the general public, and people do not ask themselves if they actually need them or not. Not only should schools teach the negative effects of taking pills regularly without the need, but the government should also impose regulations on drugs, including vitamin pills.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both questions and maintain a clear overall position: advertising and limited public scrutiny help explain purchases, while education and regulation could encourage healthier choices. The explanation of advertising is relevant, and the example of people following trends adds support. However, some ideas are less fully developed than others. The claim that purchases result from “a lack of public awareness and accessibility” is unclear, since accessibility would seem to make pills easier to buy rather than explain why people spend heavily. The proposed laws also need more explanation of how they would change diets, rather than simply restrict purchases. Develop the reasons and practical measures more precisely, with a specific example of how education could influence food choices.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear four-paragraph structure, moving from an introduction to reasons, solutions and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Additionally,” “That being said” and “In conclusion” make the stages easy to follow, and the main ideas are generally grouped appropriately. This meets the lower-band expectation of an overall coherent arrangement and shows some stronger control through clear progression. However, some connections are mechanical or imprecise: “That being said” suggests a contrast, although the paragraph introduces solutions rather than opposing the previous point. The reference in “This is possible” is also broad, and the conclusion repeats the main points without adding much synthesis. Use transitions that express the exact relationship between ideas and make references more specific.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “pharmaceutical companies,” “unsupervised intake,” “detrimental consequences” and “regulate stricter laws.” These choices help convey the subject clearly, and the meaning remains accessible throughout. There is also an attempt to use less common language, although some combinations are not natural or precise. For example, “accessibility of such pills” does not clearly explain why people buy them, “publicise the importance of drugs” is an awkward description of advertising supplements, and “change the regular diet into a healthy one” is not idiomatic. Aim for more accurate collocations and distinguish clearly between medicines and supplements. More precise phrasing would make the argument sound more fluent and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a semicolon in the opening and subordinate clauses such as “because major pharmaceutical organizations advertise their products.” Most sentences are understandable, and errors do not prevent the reader from following your argument. Some grammatical choices are less controlled, however. In “a balanced diet comprises all the necessary vitamins needed,” the repeated idea makes the construction cumbersome; “vitamins needed” could be integrated more cleanly. “The government should regulate stricter laws” also has an awkward grammatical pattern: a government can introduce or enforce laws, or regulate the sale of pills. In “people do not ask themselves if they actually need them or not,” the ending is redundant. Review verb patterns and sentence economy while continuing to use varied structures.

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