Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Usage of the vitamin pills have increased significantly over the last couple of years. This is evident by the increasing number of brands in the market and to cater the market needs, these pills are now being available over-the-counter of supermarkets. More surprisingly, If you look at the available data, the consumers are mainly 20 to 40 years of age.

I tried to analyse the reason for such visible shift. Based on a survey, conducted by XYZ Health Consultants, identified that most of the consumers were given the doctors' advice to work on their diet and vitamin pills were only prescribed to those who were having significant vitamin deficiencies. When asked for the reason of opting for vitamin pills instead of following a health diet, about 75% of the people mentioned "convenience". With the fast paced life, a perception has been created that following a healthy diet require significant time from their day to prepare the meals. Hence, vitamin pills are the solution.

I personally was advised to change my dietary habits to overcome my obesity, but still, I barely followed the advice. For me the healthy diet meant eating "tasteless food" which mainly involves only herbs and vegetables and on top of it, most of the healthy options are expensive. Take avocados for example or tortillas or brown breads. All of these are expensive as compared to fried chicken from the famous food chains.

When I shared these thoughts with my doctor, I was referred to a nutrionist. He changed my perception of a healthy diet. A controlled diet within the overall calories limit is also a healthy diet and there is no harm in eating what you like to eat as long as you are aware of the deficit you need to manage. I really liked the advice and this should how the people should be persuaded. Instead of forcing the people to eat bland items, they should be guided on how and when to eat.

Indeed, it is very rightly said "an apple a day, keeps the doctor away".

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both questions and maintain a relevant focus. The explanation that pills are chosen for “convenience” is supported by the idea that people believe healthy meals take time to prepare, while your personal experience gives a clear example of how perceptions of healthy food can discourage dietary change. Your suggestion that people receive practical guidance rather than being told to eat “bland items” is also relevant. However, the reasons for spending large sums are not fully explored: convenience is developed, but the claims about cost and food preferences are less clearly connected to pill purchases. The proposed persuasion strategy would be stronger with specific measures, such as affordable meal-planning advice or public information from health professionals.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall structure: it introduces the trend, explains a possible reason, gives a personal example, and then presents a way to encourage dietary change. Paragraphing generally supports this progression, and links such as “Hence” and “When I shared these thoughts” help show relationships between ideas. Some connections are less clear or feel abrupt. For example, the opening claims about brands and supermarket availability do not lead directly into the later discussion of consumers’ motivations, and the final proverb is not integrated into the argument. The sequence from expensive foods to the nutritionist’s advice could also be signposted more explicitly. More precise referencing and smoother links between evidence and conclusions would make the progression more consistently clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “vitamin deficiencies,” “dietary habits,” “perception,” and “controlled diet,” and your meaning is generally clear. There are also attempts at more specific phrasing, such as “fast paced life” and “overcome my obesity.” However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “visible shift,” “health diet,” and “the overall calories limit.” “Nutrionist” is also misspelled, and “brown breads” is not the natural form in this context. These slips do not prevent understanding, but they limit precision and naturalness. Aim to use standard collocations and check spelling and word forms, especially in key phrases about nutrition and consumer behaviour.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex structures, including subordinate clauses such as “When I shared these thoughts with my doctor” and a conditional phrase beginning “as long as.” Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “Usage of the vitamin pills have increased” has an article and subject–verb agreement problem, while “following a healthy diet require” needs agreement. The sentence beginning “Based on a survey” is also incomplete in its construction, and “this should how the people should be persuaded” is missing a verb. Capitalisation after “If” and punctuation around the quotation also need attention. Proofreading for agreement, complete clauses, and sentence boundaries would improve accuracy while preserving your range.

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