Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Health is an important factor of life. Some people spend a chunk of money on vitamins pills, while others take natural resources to keep themselves healthy. Although pills are easily accessible for every individual, it is not a healthy way to keep diet nutritious.So, people should choose nature diet. I will elaborate the reasons along with examples in upcoming paragraphs.

The primary reason why people spend money on vitamin pills is that it is an easy and shorter way to complete the vitamins in their body. This is because these are easily accessible in the market. For example, an individual needs to take just a pill to complete his vitamin diet, whereas they have to manage the quantity of ingredients if they cook at home. As a result, to save their time they prefer to have tablets over the cooking. Moreover, people have a hectic schedule such as they manage their personal and professional life. That is why they do not have time to look into their eating habits. Hence, to minimise the stress they find alternative ways to maintain their health such as taking such tablets.

However, people should encourage to prefer healthy ways to complete their electro lights such as meal prep and having raw vegetables and fruits. For instance, many gym freek persons cook during their day off for a week. Which not only helps them to stay healthy but also aids them in time management. By showing these ways they be can be motivated. Additionally, they should educate how they can replace snacks with raw vegetables such as carrots etc by explaining the benefits of fresh vegetables. This way at least they can begin their healthy lifestyle. These small steps can complete required vitamins in their body. In my opinion, people should considers long term and healthy ways to keep body healthy. Vitamin supplements are a temporary way of having nutrients diet. Once a person stops it then they might face same deficiency in their body. However, a healthy diet can be effective for long run even it takes a long time to work.Thus, people should choose a strong way for their health such as having natural vitamins.

In conclusion, according to aforementioned arguments, to complete the requirements in body in a short time, people choose pills, whereas I personally believe that other factors such as cooking over the weekends or raw vegetable can be considered a permanent way.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses both questions and maintains a relevant position: convenience and time pressure are given as reasons for buying supplements, while meal preparation and replacing snacks with fruit and vegetables are proposed as alternatives. The examples about cooking on a day off and choosing a pill rather than managing ingredients help make the points concrete. The explanation of why people buy pills is clearer and more developed than the persuasion strategies, which are mostly listed; for example, “By showing these ways they be can be motivated” does not explain who should demonstrate them or how. The claim that supplements may lead to recurring deficiencies also needs qualification. More specific development of practical measures, such as nutrition education or workplace support, would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two questions, and a conclusion that restates the main contrast. Ideas generally progress logically, and linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “As a result,” and “In conclusion” help guide the reader. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, with several sentences beginning with “This,” “That is why,” or “Hence.” Some connections are also unclear: “Which not only helps them…” is an incomplete sentence, and the shift from persuasion strategies to the writer’s opinion about long-term health makes the third paragraph feel crowded. Use clearer references and group related points more tightly, so each paragraph develops one main idea without relying on repeated transition phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response uses enough vocabulary to discuss convenience, health, and food choices, including phrases such as “hectic schedule,” “time management,” and “healthy lifestyle.” It also attempts more specific terms, but several choices are inaccurate or unnatural and sometimes make the meaning less clear: “vitamins pills,” “complete the vitamins,” “electro lights,” and “nutrients diet.” “Nature diet” and “gym freek persons” are also unsuitable expressions in this context. These are mainly problems of word form, collocation, and spelling rather than a lack of topic relevance. Aim for precise, natural combinations such as “vitamin supplements,” “meet nutritional needs,” and “people who go to the gym.” This would make the vocabulary more flexible and reliable.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

There is an attempt to use both simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “although,” “whereas,” and “because,” and the main ideas are usually understandable. However, errors in sentence formation and agreement remain noticeable. For example, “people should encourage to prefer” lacks a clear passive form or object, while “people should considers” has incorrect subject–verb agreement. “Which not only helps them…” is a fragment, and “they be can be motivated” has faulty word order. There are also punctuation problems where sentences run together, as in “nutritious.So” and “work.Thus.” Review clause boundaries, verb forms, and agreement, and proofread punctuation. More accurate control of these structures would make the complex sentences clearer.

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