Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-24
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.
Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?
How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In the recent days, people are suffering from the deficiency of different vitamins. Doctors are perscribing to follow healthy and nutritional diet to get all the vitamins, which are needed. While other people are consuming a large proportion of amount on vitamin pills. Mostly people are taking pills to recover the deficiency of vitamins and they are spending money on diet rather than taking harmfull pills.
To begin with, the main key reason why people spend money on vitamin pills is that individuals want to get relief from these weaknesses in less time. Healthy Diets are taking long time to recover these problems. For example, individual is suffering the deficiency of iron, which is very low. Person is not able to stand or walk, then individual would like to buy medicine or vitamin pills to fulfill this weakness.
However, people could take initiatives to improve their diet rather than spending money on pills. Mostly people do not like to eat tablets in their daily life due to side effects on their health. They improve their nutritional food, which gives protein, fat, calcium and many more. Peoper meal give extra strength to a body. If peope start to add proper meal in their diet, they can see good results in few days. Additionally, vitamin pills are very expensive as compared to meals. Everyone cannot afford these tablets, which is difficult.
In conclusion, it is reiterated that people spend a lot of money on medicines to get recovery in less time, apart from this individuals wants to follow healthy diet and tips to stay healthy and fit.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You address both questions: you suggest that people choose pills for faster relief, and you mention improving meals and the high cost of supplements. The iron-deficiency example helps illustrate the first point. However, the response only partially develops the task. The explanation of why people spend money is largely limited to wanting quick recovery, while the second part mostly lists benefits of nutritious food and affordability rather than explaining how people could be persuaded—for example, through clearer public-health advice or practical dietary guidance. Your position is also not fully clear: the opening says people spend on diet rather than harmful pills, which conflicts with the later explanation that they buy pills. Develop each answer more fully and keep your viewpoint consistent.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “To begin with” and “However,” and a conclusion. This helps readers identify the two main parts of the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and several ideas are joined mechanically rather than explained in sequence. For instance, the second body paragraph moves from side effects to nutrients, then to results and affordability without showing how these points would persuade people to change their habits. The conclusion repeats the quick-recovery idea but does not clearly summarise the proposed persuasion methods. Use clearer links between claims and explanations, and make references such as “these problems” and “this weakness” more precise.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “deficiency,” “nutritional,” “side effects,” and “afford.” These terms show an attempt to discuss health and diet rather than relying entirely on basic language. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “large proportion of amount,” “recover the deficiency,” and “fulfill this weakness”; these are not natural ways to express the intended ideas. Spelling errors such as “perscribing,” “harmfull,” and “Peoper” are also noticeable. Build a more precise set of phrases for describing supplements, symptoms, dietary habits, and public persuasion, and check spelling carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “If people start to add proper meal in their diet, they can see good results.” However, complex attempts are often faulty, and frequent errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and verb forms can make the reader pause. For example, “Healthy Diets are taking long time” has an incorrect subject and verb pattern, while “individuals wants” does not show subject–verb agreement. The example beginning “For example, individual is suffering…” is also a fragment-like sequence with unclear sentence boundaries. Practise building complete sentences around one main clause, then check articles, plurals, and agreement before adding subordinate clauses.
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