Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-07-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons wherever relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
According these two pictures, we can feel the great change between 2007 and 2010 and show the hard work of government.
In 2007, you could drive your vehicles to the city hospital by Hospital Road, and then parked at the Car park which was shared with the staff. The bus station showed in the 2007 suggested this was the most popular hosiptal for the citizens. Therefore, we have sufficient evidence to doubt the space for the staff and public was not enough. Moreover, the gate was narrow and there was only one single road to entered the hosptial, hence there might be rush during the Monday to Friday.
However, in 2010, obviously the government made lots of change in this place, like they added a new car park which was only opened to the public, while the old one was still available for the staff. they also built two roundabout to reduce the stress of transport. Bus station was a smart change, it help the citizen to have more options to the hosptial.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
该回答涵盖了地图的主要特征,例如新增的停车场和环岛。然而,分析带有一定的主观性和推测性,例如提到 'we have sufficient evidence to doubt the space... was not enough' 或 'we can feel the great change'。在雅思学术类写作任务 1 中,您必须保持客观,避免使用个人观点或情绪化语言。虽然识别出了关键变化,但描述在空间布局方面缺乏精确性(例如,环岛的具体位置或新的道路入口)。为了改进,请专注于中立地报告数据,并更准确地描述物理变化。
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
该回答分段组织,有助于读者跟随从 2007 年到 2010 年的进展。然而,衔接手段的使用有些机械,且偶尔不准确。例如,'According these two pictures' 是错误的介词短语,而 'Therefore' 被用来引入主观观点,而不是作为数据的逻辑推论。指代有时不明确,句子之间的连贯性可以更顺畅。使用更多样化的连接词并确保其使用正确,将改善报告的逻辑流程。
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
词汇对于该任务来说足够,但缺乏更高分数段所需的精确度。存在一些拼写错误,例如 'hosiptal' 和 'hosptial',以及一些生硬的词汇选择,如 'reduce the stress of transport' 而非 'alleviate traffic congestion'。词汇范围有些受限,依赖于基础描述词。为了达到更高的分数段,您应该融入更多与地图和城市规划相关的精确术语,例如 'constructed', 'relocated', 'expanded' 或 'junctions',并确保全文拼写准确。
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
该回答混合使用了简单句和复杂句,但频繁出现的语法错误偶尔会分散读者的注意力。例如 'According these two pictures'(缺少 'to')、'the gate was narrow and there was only one single road to entered'(动词形式错误)以及 'Bus station was a smart change'(缺少冠词)。标点符号基本可以接受,但对动词时态和介词的控制需要改进。专注于主谓一致和冠词的正确使用将显著提高您写作的清晰度和准确性。
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