Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons wherever relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In 2007,City hospital was simple and not very modern for patients. City hospital across the ring road however, a substantial amount of people were used that road furthermore the build was ordinry that time but later in 2010, City hospital fully rebuild and modern for patients. while builded the bus station and staff car park area that is help staff member more in the scene of reduce traffic and safe their car in car parking area . On the other hand mangement builded car parking for public car it is very effective action for them . in 2007, and now the whole hospital has changed and modern because car parking they made and proper traffic system they have to change for their people . More things I have seen roundabout the city road it is very fruitful for people to easly use the road without any problem it very great decision .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify that the hospital area changed between 2007 and 2010, and mention several relevant features, including the bus station, separate staff and public parking, and a roundabout. However, the response mainly gives opinions about whether the changes were “effective” or “fruitful” rather than clearly summarising the maps. Some details are inaccurate or unsupported: the hospital itself is not shown as being rebuilt, and the maps do not indicate that traffic was reduced or that the earlier layout was unsuitable for patients. The key changes—removal of the individual bus stops, addition of two roundabouts, and the public car park’s location beside Ring Road—are not reported accurately or fully. A clearer overview and precise descriptions of the mapped changes would make the response more complete and relevant.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response follows a basic chronological order, beginning with 2007 and then moving to 2010, and it uses linking expressions such as “however,” “later,” and “On the other hand.” These give the reader some sense of comparison. However, the ideas are crowded into one paragraph and do not progress in a clear, organised way. Several points are repeated, such as the claim that the hospital became modern, while the relationship between the road changes and the writer’s opinions is unclear. Some connectors are also used awkwardly, and the long final sentence runs several ideas together. Separate the response into an overview and focused paragraphs, and use links to show specific contrasts between the two maps.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt some topic-related vocabulary, including “ring road,” “bus station,” “staff car park,” “public car,” and “roundabout,” so the reader can recognise several features of the maps. There is also an effort to use evaluative language such as “effective” and “fruitful.” However, the vocabulary is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing a map. For example, “the build was ordinary” and “fully rebuild and modern” do not clearly describe the mapped changes; “car parking for public car” is also an awkward phrase. Spelling errors such as “ordinry,” “mangement,” and “easly” further reduce clarity. Use precise map-description terms and check spelling and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There are attempts to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example with “however,” “while,” and “because,” but these structures are often faulty, and sentence control is inconsistent. Errors in tense and verb form include “were used that road,” “fully rebuild,” and “builded.” Articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries are also problematic, as in “City hospital was simple” and the extended final sentence beginning “More things I have seen.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and several ideas joined without clear sentence breaks. These errors sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions and build shorter, complete sentences before combining them with subordinate clauses.

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