Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In this world, few people have many choices. what they do.I agree that people have many choices on their life, if a man have numerous options or skills than he can chose easily what he want to do.

In this essay, people have various options in their life's. when a man has many experiences and knowledege,and learn english vocabulary than he read different books or watching movies in english. it helps to understand them. So, he easily choose one in different courses such as , IELTS,PTE,Duolingo and Tofel therefore he success in his life.

Som of people have choices in their job fields they have many opportunity to find a job in europ or other countries if they have command in english and speak forign language than they easily got the job.

Another significant of chocies in my perspective some people have many chocies because they have their own bussiness.But many of people who are uneducated they have no too much options because they have not running there own bussiness but have some options for examples they worked in different shops and school and pizza shopes like a delivery boy or any electric shop.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 194 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas, which remain superficial and under-developed. While you attempt to address the prompt by discussing choices in education and employment, the arguments lack depth and logical progression. The position is stated but not consistently supported with relevant, well-explained examples. To improve, you must expand your arguments with more detailed reasoning and ensure you meet the length requirement to allow for a full exploration of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear structure. Paragraphing is present but does not effectively separate distinct ideas. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and often inaccurate, such as the repetitive use of 'than' instead of 'then' or 'therefore'. The progression of ideas is disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow your line of reasoning. To improve, focus on using a wider range of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in contrast') and ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that relates directly to your main argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, often relying on simple words like 'many' or 'choices'. There are frequent errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'forign' (foreign), 'bussiness' (business), and 'Tofel' (TOEFL). These errors, combined with the limited range of vocabulary, hinder the clarity of your writing. You should aim to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to education and the labor market, and practice the correct spelling of common academic terms to improve your precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that impede communication. There are significant issues with sentence structure, such as fragments ('what they do.') and run-on sentences. Subject-verb agreement is inconsistent, for example, 'a man have' instead of 'a man has'. Punctuation is also problematic, with missing spaces after commas and periods. The range of structures is limited to simple sentences, with very few successful attempts at complex forms. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement will help improve your accuracy.

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