Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Here is the ten countries in the bar chart to show the production and consumption of electricity. At the top China produce and consumes more electricity from other countries discussed in given Chart bar.

The minimum production and consumption of electricity in Korea.

In between China and Korea different countries has been discussed for their production and consumption of electricity.

The second one in this range is United States.

From top to bottom comparisons we see different countries like China, United States, Russia, Japan, India, Canada, France, Brazil, Germany, and Korea, Rep.

The overview comparison about the production and consumption of different countries tells us that the energy needs as well as its production. For such countries which are rich in population the need of electricity energy is more as compared to the countries which are less in population.

In the current age the need of electricity for every aspect of life is manedetory because every machine and mostly households appliances works only electricity.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to adequately summarize the data. While it mentions the top and bottom countries, it lacks a clear, analytical overview of the trends. The description of the data is superficial and does not provide specific figures or meaningful comparisons between production and consumption levels. The final paragraph discusses general knowledge about electricity needs rather than focusing on the provided chart, which is irrelevant to the task. To improve, you must report specific data points from the chart and focus strictly on the information presented rather than providing external commentary.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The essay lacks logical progression. The sentences are disjointed and do not flow well, making the response difficult to follow. There is a lack of cohesive devices to link ideas, and the paragraphing is ineffective. The transition between the introduction, the list of countries, and the final commentary is abrupt. To improve, you should group related information together and use linking words (e.g., 'in contrast', 'furthermore', 'consequently') to create a more cohesive structure that guides the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very basic and repetitive. There are several errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'manedetory' instead of 'mandatory' and 'Chart bar' instead of 'bar chart'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to describe data trends effectively. You should aim to use more precise terminology related to data analysis, such as 'surpassed', 'accounted for', 'fluctuated', or 'remained stable', and ensure that you use the correct terminology for the chart type.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'China produce and consumes', 'different countries has been discussed') and incorrect sentence structures. The use of articles is inconsistent, and the phrasing is often unnatural. The response relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and attempts at more complex sentences are often inaccurate. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy, such as verb tense consistency and subject-verb agreement, will significantly improve the clarity of your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.