Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-09-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

We collected information of production and consumption of electricicity of top ten countries of the year 2014. I will describe all countries production and consumption rate.

The number one is china as you know it is the 2nd largest population country as of now. more popuation means more electricity production with 5398 production and 5322 consmption

the second place is united states with 4099 production and 3866 consumption

thr comes russia with 1057 prodcution and 1038 consumption and followed by japan with 936.2 production and 856.7 consumption and next comes india with 871 production and 698.8 consumption rate it preetymuch less compared others beaucse india has 1st place in highest popualtion and next comes canada with 618.9 production and 499.9 consumption and brazil with 530.7 production and 455.8 consumption and germany with 526.6 production and 582.5 consmption and with least korea, rep with 485.1 production and 449.5 consmption this gives us the clarity that china has more electrcity production and consmption has korea, rep has lowest among all the countries listed here

have noticed one thing except germany all other 9 countries has more production rate than consmption rate. but in gemany the consmption rate is more compared to production

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover the top ten countries for electricity production and consumption in 2014, citing figures for China, the United States, Russia, Japan, India, Canada, Brazil, Germany, and South Korea. However, the report suffers from significant issues regarding academic register and task framing. It begins with inappropriate personal commentary ('I will describe...', 'as you know...'), which fails to maintain an objective tone. While the main features and general comparisons are highlighted—such as noting that Germany is the only country where consumption exceeds production—the organization lacks a formal overview or summary structure. Key figures are generally accurate according to the data, but the integration of external demographic claims ('2nd largest population country', 'india has 1st place in highest popualtion') detracts from the precise reporting required in Academic Task 1.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response is poorly paragraphed, consisting primarily of a single massive, run-on block of text following a brief introductory sentence. There is a complete lack of standard academic formatting and paragraph breaks to separate the introduction, body details, and overview. Cohesive devices are minimal, repetitive ('and next comes', 'and then'), and punctuation is largely neglected—most sentences begin with lowercase letters and lack proper terminal punctuation, relying instead on continuous conjunctions. Although a basic logical sequence of countries is followed based on the chart rankings, the overall structural cohesion fails to meet the criteria for Band 6 due to the absence of proper paragraphing and mechanical error handling.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic, repetitive, and heavily constrained. Words like 'production', 'consumption', and 'country' are repeated frequently without variation. There are numerous spelling errors throughout the text, including 'electricicity', 'popuation', 'consmption', 'prodcution', 'preetymuch', 'beaucse', 'popualtion', 'electrcity', and 'gemany'. The range of vocabulary is inadequate for a higher band, relying entirely on simple terms copied or poorly recalled from the prompt. While the reader can generally follow the intended meaning despite the numerous lexical inaccuracies, the high frequency of spelling mistakes severely limits the lexical score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. The text demonstrates a heavy reliance on simple, coordinate clauses linked by 'and', with very few successful complex structures. There is a complete disregard for capitalization (e.g., 'china', 'united states', 'russia', 'gemany') and standard punctuation, resulting in run-on sentences such as 'with least korea, rep with 485.1 production and 449.5 consmption this gives us the clarity that china has more electrcity production and consmption has korea, rep has lowest among all the countries listed here'. Subject-verb agreement and prepositional use are also frequently flawed (e.g., 'all other 9 countries has more production rate'). Frequent errors impede readability and demonstrate limited structural control.

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