Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The bar chart illustrates the top ten countries for the manufacturing and usage of eleticity in 2014. Overall, it can be clearly seen highest use and created a eletricity in china and second was united states and next was russia at the followed as japan, india, canada, france, brazil, germany, korea, rep was less eletricity usage.

In detail, in 2014 the most highest usage eletricity in china they were manufacturing 5398 billions kwh and they were use 5322 billions kwh and second highest was united states they were created 4099 billions kwh and they were consumption 3866 billions kwh and next, russia was created eletricity and use eletricity was 1057 to 1038 while japan created eletricity 936 and usage 856 at h

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the chart’s subject and give a broad overview that China ranks first, followed by the United States and Russia. The figures you report for these countries are generally accurate. However, the response covers only a small part of the data: it stops partway through Japan and gives no meaningful comparison of the remaining countries, including Germany, whose consumption exceeds its production. The overview is also unclear in places, such as “was less electricity usage,” and does not clearly summarise the overall pattern. The response is 122 words, below the required 150, which further limits the detail and coverage. To improve, complete the comparison across the countries and state the main patterns clearly before supporting them with selected figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening overview is followed by a paragraph beginning “In detail,” and the countries are introduced in roughly chart order. This gives the reader some sense of the topic and sequence. However, progression is limited because the detail paragraph ends abruptly at “while Japan … at h,” and most information is joined in one long sentence with repeated “and” and “next.” The overview also combines several points in a way that is difficult to follow. Use separate sentences to compare groups of countries, and make the paragraphing reflect a clear overview followed by complete supporting details. More precise linking phrases would help show contrasts and rankings.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “manufacturing,” “usage,” “consumption,” and “created,” and the reader can usually identify the intended topic. However, vocabulary is repetitive and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing electricity data. “Manufacturing electricity” and “created electricity” are less suitable than “produced” or “generated electricity,” while “most highest usage” is an incorrect, repetitive form. There are also spelling errors in “eleticity” and “eletricity,” and “billions kwh” is not expressed accurately. Build a more precise range of chart language, including “production,” “consumption,” “stood at,” and “exceeded,” and check spelling and unit formatting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to communicate comparisons using simple clauses and some joined structures, for example, “they were manufacturing 5398 … and they were use 5322.” However, grammatical control is weak: verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction are frequently inaccurate, as in “they were use,” “second highest was united states,” and “china they were manufacturing.” Several clauses run together without clear punctuation, making relationships between figures harder to follow, and the final sentence is incomplete. Most sentences rely on the same basic pattern, so the range is very limited. Practise concise comparison structures such as “China produced …, while consumption was …” and check subject–verb agreement, past-tense forms, and sentence boundaries.

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