Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The bar chart illustrite compares between countries production and consumption of electricity in 2014. with data presented of production and consumption of Kwh

Overall all of countrys have minmium differnet between produciton of electricty and consuption china and america are high production comparitivly consuption of electriy and its beneficial for their citizens and good for Econmy of these countrys china number of production 5,398 billion Kwh and number of consumption is 5322 of lertiricty but United states production are 4,099 billion Kwh and consumption 3,866 which to good but russia number of production electrticty is 1,057 billion Kwh and constiom is 10,38 which good but japan is 936

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the chart’s subject and include several relevant figures, especially for China and the United States. However, the response reports only a small part of the data and ends while beginning to describe Japan, so it does not provide a complete summary or a clear overview of the main comparisons. The claim that all countries have a “minimum difference” is too broad: Germany is the exception, with consumption (582.5) exceeding production (526.6), while India also has a notable gap. The statement that the figures are “beneficial” for citizens and the economy is not supported by the chart. The response is also 42 words below the required minimum. To improve, give a concise overview and compare the highest and lower-ranked countries accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response, beginning with an introduction and then moving to an overall statement and examples. The figures for China and the United States are grouped together, which gives the reader some sense of comparison. However, the second paragraph becomes a long, run-on sequence of claims and numbers, with few clear sentence boundaries. The response also stops abruptly at “but japan is 936,” so the progression is incomplete. Linking words such as “but” and “which” do not always show the intended relationship clearly. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and key comparisons, and organise the data into complete sentences, for example, comparing the two leading countries before summarising the remaining figures.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant chart vocabulary, including “production,” “consumption,” “billion Kwh,” and “compares,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is basic and several words are repeated, while frequent spelling errors—such as “illustrite,” “countrys,” “electriy,” and “consuption”—make the writing difficult to read. Some expressions are also imprecise or unnatural, including “minimum different” and “good for Econmy.” Choose accurate terms such as “difference,” “higher,” and “exceeded,” and check spelling carefully. A wider set of comparison phrases, such as “by contrast,” “approximately,” and “the largest gap,” would help you describe the chart more precisely without relying on repeated wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to form longer sentences and use comparison structures, but control is limited and errors frequently affect clarity. For example, “The bar chart illustrite compares between countries production and consumption” has an unclear sentence structure, and “Overall all of countrys have…” lacks accurate sentence formation and agreement. Several clauses are joined without appropriate punctuation, particularly in the long paragraph listing China, the United States, Russia, and Japan. There are also problems with articles, possessives, and verb forms, as in “china number of production.” Practise writing short, complete sentences first, then combine ideas using accurate clauses. For example: “China produced 5,398 billion kWh, slightly more than it consumed (5,322 billion kWh).”

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