Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry.

Why is this the case?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

although after taking more advance setps in cultivation and agricultures a huge popoulation of the world still have no food to eat beacuse it lack of cultivation education and people don't know how to become the soil more benificial the other reasone is that world mafia they give fartiliziers and insect killing sprays at very high cost to the former and gve them loan at high interest .in the return they crops at very low costs the formers don'have engough facilities and advance cultivation methods .the third bigest problem is the increasing the price of things day by day futhermore the lack of sources to provied the food to the needy people .in my view we should facilitate the farmers to grow more feeds educate them about the advance methods .give them fartilizers and other necessary things at low costs .we should increase the employment the most common and huge problem is the lack of employments we must create the considerable oppurtunities for workers we spend most incomes and areas for cultivation mostly people used the cultivation areas for the construction they used these areas for their bussniness. our government make sure they not take too much texs from the formers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both questions by suggesting causes such as limited farming knowledge, costly inputs and loans, rising prices, and lack of employment, then proposing farmer education, cheaper supplies, more jobs, and lower taxes. These are relevant ideas, but the response only partially develops them: for example, the claim that “world mafia” controls farm inputs is unclear, and the effects of unemployment or construction on food access are not explained. Your position is present in “in my view,” but the response would be stronger with a clearer explanation of how each cause leads to hunger and how each solution would help. The required minimum of 250 words is not met; the response is 49 words short, which limits the opportunity to develop the points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic sequence from causes to solutions, and linking expressions such as “the other reason,” “furthermore,” and “in my view” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, the response is presented as one long paragraph, so the shift from explaining causes to proposing solutions is difficult to follow. Several ideas are joined together without clear relationships, particularly the points about prices, food distribution, employment, and land use. Some transitions are repetitive or do not clarify the connection between claims. Use separate paragraphs for causes and solutions, and organise each paragraph around one main point, followed by an explanation or example. This would give the reader a clearer progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “cultivation,” “fertilizers,” “insect killing sprays,” “employment,” and “construction,” which helps communicate the subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear, such as “world mafia,” “become the soil more beneficial,” and “grow more feeds.” Frequent spelling errors—including “popoulation,” “reasone,” and “oppurtunities”—also make the response harder to read. Aim to use accurate, natural phrases for agricultural costs and food access, and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the causes and solutions without relying on broad or unclear wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to combine ideas using clauses and connectors, but most sentences are long strings of clauses with little punctuation, and grammatical errors frequently make relationships between ideas difficult to understand. For example, “a huge population of the world still have no food to eat because it lack of cultivation education” has problems with subject–verb agreement and sentence structure. In “the other reason is that world mafia they give,” the clause structure is incomplete or duplicated. Articles, plurals, and verb forms are also often inaccurate. Practise writing shorter complete sentences first, then combine them with accurate conjunctions. Check that each sentence has a clear subject and verb, and use full stops to separate distinct points.

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