Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given chart illustrates average percentage in typical foods in three types nutrients , which of them would be more harmful if it has eaten.

Overall the dinner and lunch are more higher in both sodium and saturated fat while the snacks are 42 percent with added sugar, with second highest proportion are breakfast wich remain constant in both sodium and saturated fat while in added sugar dinner is the second highest proportion which is 23%, if you see the average percentage of consumed meals of USA the saturated fat there is the third highest proportion of snacks are 21% which in the sodium oly 14% while in the added sugar the breakfast is the most down proportion which only 16% .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the broad pattern that dinner and lunch contribute relatively high shares of sodium and saturated fat, and you note that snacks account for the largest share of added sugar. However, the response is only a partial summary: it gives few clear, accurate comparisons and does not report the key figures for lunch and dinner in a systematic way. The claim that breakfast is the second-highest for sodium and saturated fat is inaccurate: breakfast is tied with snacks for the lowest sodium share and is the lowest for saturated fat. The response also contains only 122 words, below the required 150, so the overview and data are underdeveloped. Include a concise overview followed by accurate comparisons across all three nutrients.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to begin with an introduction and then give an overview, and the response does identify some related patterns. However, the ideas are packed into one long paragraph, with no clear progression from an overview to supporting details. The sentence beginning “Overall” runs through several comparisons without clear boundaries, making relationships between the figures difficult to follow. Linking phrases such as “while” and “which” are repeated but do not consistently clarify the comparisons. Organise the response into separate paragraphs, and present one nutrient or a clear set of comparisons at a time. This would make the information easier to track and give the summary a more coherent structure.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some task-relevant vocabulary, including “proportion,” “sodium,” “saturated fat” and “added sugar,” so the main subject is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “average percentage in typical foods,” “more higher,” and “most down proportion.” These expressions make some comparisons awkward or unclear. Spelling errors such as “wich” and “oly” also reduce accuracy. Use standard chart language, for example “the proportion of sodium in meals” and “the lowest share,” and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help communicate the comparisons without relying on repeated uses of “proportion.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to combine ideas using subordinate clauses and contrast, but the long sentence structures are often faulty and make the comparisons hard to interpret. For example, “which of them would be more harmful if it has eaten” has an unclear subject and incorrect verb construction, while “with second highest proportion are breakfast” lacks a clear grammatical structure. There are also problems with articles, agreement and punctuation, including the comma splice-like run-on in the overview. Sentence forms are limited in effective control, and errors sometimes impede understanding. Use shorter, complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, such as “Dinner has the highest sodium share, at 43%.” Then check agreement and punctuation before combining comparisons.

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