Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The growing influence of situations has sparked various debates. It is significant because of its imapact on both individuals and communities. A few members of society believe that it is worth while to accept the bad situations such as shortage of money and so on, while others believe that it is better to try and improve situations. In this essayy, I will discuss both views in subsequent paragraphs along with my personal opinion and lead to logical conclusion.

In order to state the points in favour of the first statement, the primary reason is that good and bad circumstances are part of life. Some people believe that it is best way to accept it. Some individuals are unhappy with their jobs because ample of reason such as heavy workload, poor working condition and unable to cooperate with collegues all these reasons make the situation unsatisfactory by accepting these situation individual have to work because they want money to fulfil their basic needs and maintain stability in their life. Moreover, shortage of money also contribute to make situation worse.

On the other hand, others think that it is better to try and improve circumstances. Firstly, citizens have to work hard beyond their capabilities to improve their lifestyle. Individuals are not ristricted to particular limits.They have to perform outstanding in every aspect of life to improve in their situations. For example individual belong to lower middle class family unable to fulfil daily requirements but they work hard, study well day and night and rectuite in army to improve their household situation.

In conclusion, although both statements have valid points, I believe that it is better to try and improve circumstances such as perform well and became a progressive citizen of society. Howerever, it depend upon person preferences and circumstances.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You introduce both views and state a preference for improving circumstances, so the response is relevant to the question. However, the discussion is only partially developed: the acceptance argument mainly says that people need to keep working to meet basic needs, while the improvement argument relies on working hard and one brief example about joining the army. These points do not fully explain when acceptance may be sensible or how people can realistically improve their circumstances. Your conclusion also weakens the position by saying the choice depends on personal preferences and circumstances, without clarifying your own view. Develop each side with clearer reasoning and make your final opinion consistent and definite.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Transitions such as “On the other hand” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the broad direction. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven, and some sentences combine several ideas without clear links. For example, the sentence beginning “Some individuals are unhappy with their jobs” moves through reasons for dissatisfaction, acceptance, basic needs, and financial shortage in one long sequence. The opening also promises a “logical conclusion” but does not clearly build toward one. Use shorter, more clearly connected sentences, and organise each body paragraph around one main reason followed by explanation or an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “shortage of money,” “basic needs,” “workload,” and “circumstances,” and you attempt more formal expressions such as “maintain stability.” However, the range is limited and several choices or forms are inaccurate, which sometimes makes meaning less clear. Examples include “ample of reason,” “perform outstanding,” and “rectuite in army”; “situations” and “improve” are also repeated frequently. Spelling errors such as “imapact,” “collegues,” and “Howerever” further reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of expressions for employment and financial hardship, and check spelling and collocations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because,” “while,” and “although.” Nevertheless, complex sentences are often not controlled successfully, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and punctuation occur throughout. For instance, “shortage of money also contribute” has a subject–verb agreement error, while “it is best way to accept it” is missing an article. The sentence beginning “Some individuals are unhappy with their jobs” becomes a run-on, with several ideas joined without appropriate punctuation. There are also inconsistent spaces after full stops and commas. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly attached supporting clause, then proofread agreement and articles.

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