Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

I would like to about a two situations first is, some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation. Some people aruge that it is better tp try and improve these situations.

First, people thinks unsatisfactory job is not best for us he thinks in this time we accept bad situation because we work hard but we have shortage of money so why we work hard. We work lot and we work every where but still we have shortage of money and he is broken because he try everywhere but still he has no money.

Moreover, some people said that it is better to try and improve such situations. These people thinks try is best option to fight a bad situations and work hard. They thinks hard work is a key of sucess and these people doing work hard and he will sucess one day. They work everywhere and doing a job. Recent years I see many people who work hard and this I see they become a very good things achive and become a happy life.

In conculion, I think aruge is better then to accept a bad situation because work hard is best option for every people. Some people said accept bad situations but I said fight to bad situations. Work hard is a very good desicion. I think every people try to work hard and become a happy person.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You present both views and make your position clear in the conclusion: you believe people should try to improve difficult circumstances. However, the discussion is very brief and the ideas are only minimally developed. The first view is reduced mainly to working hard while still having little money, and the second relies on general claims that hard work brings success; neither is explained with a specific example or fuller reasoning. The response also contains 213 words, so it is 37 words below the required minimum; 22 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. To strengthen the response, explain why someone might accept a bad situation, develop the opposing view with a concrete example, and expand your own reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, a paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. Connectors such as “First,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” help signal the intended stages. However, ideas within paragraphs are not arranged clearly, and several points repeat rather than build on one another—for example, “work hard” and “work everywhere” recur without a clear progression. References such as “he” and “these people” are also unclear because the groups being discussed shift. Use one main idea per paragraph, explain it in a logical sequence, and make pronoun references precise. More purposeful links between claims and examples would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use basic vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “unsatisfactory job,” “shortage of money,” “accept,” and “improve,” so the reader can identify the subject of the essay. However, the range is narrow and several words or phrases are repeated, especially “work hard,” “bad situation,” and “people.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “aruge,” “sucess,” “achive,” and “conculion,” as well as awkward combinations such as “fight to bad situations” and “become a happy life.” These choices sometimes make the message harder to understand. Build a wider set of topic-specific expressions and check spelling and natural word combinations when revising.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Most sentences use simple subject–verb patterns, and you attempt to connect ideas with “because” and “but.” However, the range of sentence structures is very limited, and frequent errors affect clarity. For example, “people thinks” and “these people thinks” have subject–verb agreement errors, while “he thinks in this time we accept” has an unclear clause structure. The opening sentence, “I would like to about a two situations first is,” is also incomplete and difficult to interpret. Articles, plurals, and verb forms need more consistent control. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, then check agreement and punctuation; adding a few accurate complex sentences would also improve range.

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