Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.
Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Undoubtedly, in this rapid growing world, people are putting less efforts to reach their goals because of lethargic lifestyle. Although, on one hand, proponents have the same notion that it is good enough to normalize the unfavourable conditions likewise unsatisfactory jobs or lack of money, while on the other hand argument is given that it is better to do more hardwork so that one can acheive the improved oneself and acquire the aim. In the forthcoming paragraph, the essay will explore the disclosure and and shed light on the very topic.
To embark with first notion, nowadays population has ignored these day to day task on which their life dependency takes place such as remunerations, living environment, working ambience and the toxic job culture. These all factors contribute to above mentioned repercussions because of improvement of techology which led individual to a lazy lifestyle. Apart from this, the new key factor pimarily known as EMI made this whole scenario most crucial. To elaborate, nowadays every working professional is getting allured by this shining of EMI rather than improving self to earn increased wages. To cite an epitome, even though a middle class person buys a phone which almost worth more than 1 lakh , if compared, it can be his/ her months of salary, this reflects the trap to use these downpayments and installments as a bait to lure the citizen.
On the paradoxical side, analysing of own and subsequantly searching the lagging qualities and ultimately finishing by improve the self can totally turns the table. Moreover, the self-realisation can change the person and gives a puch to acheive the required goal which can be high earnings, more saving, a big house or apartment, or anything else. However, by reducing dependency over the technology and less usage of artificial intelligence along with combining smart work with hard work can improve the life in all aspects required. For example, Marjk Zuckerberg, the CEO of Meta, once said "despite of being the owner of facebook or instagram, i prefferably do not consume them because it can harm my daily productivity", which shows a clear sign regading the hinderance of excessive use of social media, impacting not only some of the hours, but the whole substantial day of that person.
In conclusion, I totally opine that an individual must try to improve oneself in his perspective choices rather that normalizing the worst situation occuring in the lifestyle because of lack of superiority over the task.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You address both views and state a clear preference for trying to improve one’s circumstances, especially in the conclusion. The discussion of accepting a poor situation focuses mainly on technology, EMI purchases and consumer debt, however, rather than explaining why someone might reasonably accept an unsatisfactory job or limited income. The second view is more directly relevant, with self-reflection and effort presented as ways to improve earnings and savings, but these points are not fully explained. The example about Mark Zuckerberg supports a point about social-media use and productivity, yet its connection to improving a bad job or financial situation is indirect. Develop each side around the specific situations in the prompt and explain the consequences of each choice more clearly.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion that restates your position. Signposting such as “To embark with” and “On the paradoxical side” helps indicate the shift between arguments. However, some links are mechanical or unclear, and the progression within paragraphs can be difficult to follow. For example, the first body paragraph moves from daily tasks and working conditions to technology and EMI without clearly showing how these points explain accepting a bad situation. The opening sentence also introduces lethargy, which is not developed as the essay’s central line of argument. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to the view it supports; ensure references such as “these all factors” have an unmistakable antecedent.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You attempt a broad range of vocabulary, including “unfavourable conditions,” “remunerations,” “self-realisation” and “dependency,” and some choices suit a formal discussion. However, inaccurate word choice, spelling and collocation sometimes make the meaning unclear or unnatural. Examples include “rapid growing world,” “normalize the unfavourable conditions,” “achieve the improved oneself,” and “a puch to achieve.” Several expressions also sound overly elaborate where a simpler phrase would be more precise, such as “the disclosure” and “cite an epitome.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. A more controlled range of familiar academic vocabulary would communicate your ideas more effectively than ambitious wording used imprecisely.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning with “Although” and “even though,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, some sentence structures are faulty, particularly where clauses are combined or verb forms do not agree. For instance, “Although, on one hand … while on the other hand” creates an incomplete and confusing construction, while “self-realisation can change the person and gives a puch” shifts verb form within a coordinated phrase. There are also errors in articles, plurals and sentence boundaries, as in “a phone which almost worth” and the long opening sentence. To improve, build complex sentences around one clear main clause, check subject–verb agreement and parallel verb forms, and use punctuation to separate complete ideas.
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