Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In contemporary society, situations are a matter of considerable debate nowadays because some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. While, others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. From my perspective, it is beneficial to try and improve such situation because better environment is the basic necessity for everyone and they can also gives us a better career in the future.

On the one hand, bad situation can makes our life more dangerous and in this way we can also be face some bad problems in our lives. Moreover, unsatisfactory job can not make us feel happy. numerous people are just waste their time in unsatisfactory job. In addition, Numerous families are face many financial issues nowadays and the main reason is that shortage of money. They cannot afford their expenses and which leads to anxiety and depression. For instance, a person who got a job in office, there working hours can creates a lot of issues for him. Similarly, In this way he cannot focused properly.

On the other hand, the main reason is related to try and improve such situation. But this may also helpful for public and government should think about to enhance such situations. Additionally, they should provide them comfortable environment for working and also should give money according to their expectations. Numerous people can stay focused on their work with the help of improve such situations. People should also find a better job according to their qualification level. Moreover, they can also apply online for different jobs which can be very helpful for them.

In conclusion, This essay discussed the both views of situations. Furthermore, shortage of money can be helpful for some people but not for everyone.In my opinion, Better situation can also provides us a significant number of opportunities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You present a clear opinion in the introduction—that improving a difficult situation is preferable—and you include points about job dissatisfaction, financial pressure, and seeking better employment. However, the discussion of accepting a bad situation is not clearly explained: the first body paragraph mainly describes its disadvantages rather than why someone might choose to accept it. The second view is also developed in broad terms, with limited explanation of how individuals or governments could improve circumstances. The conclusion introduces the unclear claim that a shortage of money “can be helpful for some people,” which conflicts with your main position. To strengthen the response, explain a genuine reason for each view, support each with a specific example, and keep your opinion consistent throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and phrases such as “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” signal the intended structure. However, progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because ideas are loosely connected or repeated. For example, the first body paragraph moves from danger to job dissatisfaction, financial problems, and working hours without clearly showing how these points support accepting a bad situation. Linking phrases such as “Moreover,” “In addition,” and “Similarly” are sometimes used mechanically or do not express the relationship between ideas accurately. The conclusion also shifts direction. Organise each paragraph around one clear claim, explain it, and use referencing and transitions that make the logical connection explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the general subject, including “unsatisfactory job,” “financial issues,” “anxiety and depression,” and “qualification level.” There are also attempts at more formal expressions, such as “significant number of opportunities.” However, the range is limited and several phrases are repetitive or imprecise, including repeated uses of “situation” and “better,” as well as “bad problems” and “comfortable environment.” Some collocations and word forms are inaccurate, for example “waste their time in unsatisfactory job” and “with the help of improve such situations,” which make parts less natural. Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing acceptance, financial hardship, and career change, and check that words combine naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a reason clause in “because better environment is the basic necessity” and a relative clause in “which leads to anxiety and depression.” However, control of sentence structure and basic grammar is inconsistent, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to interpret. Examples include “bad situation can makes,” “they can also gives,” “numerous families are face,” and “he cannot focused,” where verb forms or agreement are incorrect. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “in unsatisfactory job” and “everyone.In my opinion.” Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, modal verb patterns, and articles before adding more complex structures; then proofread for complete, correctly punctuated sentences.

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