Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Unsatisfactory job or shortage of money are very common problem in our society especially less develop countries. Nowadays, some people claim that it is best to accept a harmful situation such as any difficulty in job or shortage of money and others think that it is better to try again and again improve any hard situation. In this essay i will discuss both views and share my own opinion.

On one hand, every person in life face detrimental issues and many problems like job, money, and health. Who people accept these difficulties with brave heart, they survive in life. By this i mean, every one face different problems necessary one time in life. For example, a business man face trade problems and high qualified person face academic problems and a job holder person face salary package problem. Therefore, who people face these different issues and try to survive but in the end they make successful inhabitants in society. This type of people role model for demotivated persons.

On the other hand, some people believe that it is better to try survive in any difficult situation. For this reason, for better life do survive in problem is very necessary. For instance, every rich person and sports man like Bill Gates and Ronaldo face many difficulties but try to improve yourself. Therefore, in the end they are successful example for every society.

All things considered, my opinion with one hand because in this opinion every thing explain clearly. That is why, everyone face difficulties in life but they work on authentic issues. As a result, they are role model of society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You introduce both positions and state that you will give your opinion, so the response is relevant to the question. However, the discussion only partially addresses the two views: the first body paragraph mainly says that people who endure difficulties can become successful, while the second says people should try to improve their situation, without clearly explaining why accepting a bad job or financial hardship might be preferable. Your own position is also difficult to identify: “my opinion with one hand” does not make clear which view you support, and the conclusion repeats general claims rather than resolving the comparison. Develop each side with a direct reason and a specific example, then state your preference clearly and consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “On one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader see that you are attempting to discuss both views. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear, and several links do not show a logical relationship. For example, “Who people accept these difficulties with brave heart, they survive in life” is hard to follow, and “Therefore” introduces a conclusion that is not fully established by the preceding example. The conclusion also repeats ideas rather than bringing the discussion together. Use clearer topic sentences, connect each example explicitly to its main point, and avoid repeating linking phrases mechanically.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt some topic-related vocabulary, including “detrimental issues,” “shortage of money,” “successful,” and “role model.” These choices show an effort to discuss hardship and achievement, but the range is limited and several word combinations are inaccurate or unclear, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to understand. Examples include “survive in problem,” “successful inhabitants,” and “salary package problem”; these do not express the intended ideas naturally. “Less develop countries” also has an incorrect word form. Build a more precise set of phrases for employment and financial hardship, and check collocations as well as word forms. Prefer clear, natural expressions over ambitious vocabulary that does not fit the sentence.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use some simple sentences and attempt longer structures with examples and cause-and-effect links. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to make several sentences difficult to interpret. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “every person in life face” and “a business man face”; the relative clause “Who people accept these difficulties” is also incorrectly formed. Other problems include missing articles and awkward sentence construction, as in “For this reason, for better life do survive in problem is very necessary.” Capitalisation and punctuation need attention too, particularly the lowercase “i” and the comma splice-like phrasing around “That is why.” Practise accurate basic clauses first, then add complex structures with clear subjects and verbs.

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