Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.
Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
People have different views about whether bad situation,some people argued that is beat to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory work or low level of income, whereas others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. This essay will discussed on both topic before explaining why I agree with to make and improve better life.
On the one hand, a large number of population believe that to agree on a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory employment or shortage of money. This means that people are doing any kinds of work and enjoy it, however some people are also not like their own jobs for low level of income. For example, citizens of the nation are depend on work to make their life esaier. As a result, there are many drawback for this reason on people who are doing work under few salary, such as toilet cleaner, waitress in the office.
On the other hand, others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. In other words, people have to accept their bad situation and work hard on their problems. This means that residents of the nation have to agree on their work and improve it in beneficial way. For instance, people have to believe to try and improve their life doing hard work. I believe this view is more convincing because to try and make life better in the nation or in family.
In conclusion, although people have to accept their bad situation has some advantages however, I believe that to try and improve it by doing hard work is more beneficial because to live happy.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
You address both views and state a preference for trying to improve life, so the response is relevant to the question. However, the discussion is minimal: the first view is not clearly explained, and examples such as “toilet cleaner” and “waitress” are named without showing why accepting these jobs or circumstances might be reasonable. The second view is also repeated rather than developed, and the conclusion gives little support for your opinion. The response contains 242 words, below the required 250; the 33 words copied from the task prompt are not counted. To strengthen the response, explain the reasons behind each view and develop each with a specific, relevant example.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The essay has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted with “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps readers identify the two positions. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear, and several sentences repeat or contradict earlier points. For example, the second body paragraph says people should improve their situation, but then says they “have to accept their bad situation.” Connections such as “This means” and “As a result” do not always show a clear logical relationship. The conclusion also combines ideas awkwardly. Make each paragraph follow a clear sequence—claim, explanation, example—and use linking phrases only when the relationship between ideas is precise.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “unsatisfactory employment,” “shortage of money,” “income,” and “beneficial.” However, the range is basic and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “agree on a bad situation,” “low level of income,” and “improve it in beneficial way.” There are also spelling and word-form problems, such as “esaier” and “drawback” where a plural is needed. Aim to learn natural phrases for discussing work and finances, and check spelling and word forms. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the contrast between accepting circumstances and taking steps to change them.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a contrast introduced by “whereas” and a concession in the conclusion. Some sentence patterns communicate the main ideas, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction remain frequent. For example, “This essay will discussed” uses the wrong verb form, “citizens … are depend” has an incorrect verb pattern, and “there are many drawback” has a number-agreement error. The opening sentence is also difficult to parse because its clauses are joined incorrectly. Practise building accurate subject–verb sentences first, then add subordinate clauses. Check verb forms after modal verbs and auxiliaries, singular/plural agreement, and punctuation between clauses.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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