Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In today,s Most of the individuals are suffering in crisis due to steadily increased living funds in our daily life. Many peoples thought that after hard months work nothing is more work invigorating that an excursion in the natural sights and sounds but at the end those all worth is going on funds so than most of the peoples are involving in the illegal activities to earned the money from bad way.

To be very straight away, they doing jobs in those factories whose they are not registered in government record. It is the short way to earn money. Furthermore others peoples belived that improved his situation and they are doing work by himself and her family. So its the rose benefit is they wil became brave moreover, they would achieve all goals in his life.

When came worse time on individuals so most of the peoles are give up from his goals and they will be come dark member of crime because he lost the confidence on him so it is not the right way to will become rich. From my perspective way I like that persons whose doing handle problems in bad times they will be such worriors and when bad time is passed and worth time is coming they will be proud on himself.

In conslusion to take the revenge from the worse time for his goals and his families not will the take part of bad activities and take believe on her himself. Wore jobs are not good for the individuals because they are will become criminal and did not come out from it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You attempt to discuss both accepting hardship and trying to improve one’s circumstances, and you give a personal view in the third paragraph: people who handle difficult times can feel proud when conditions improve. However, the response only minimally addresses the specific comparison in the prompt. The opening focuses on rising living costs and illegal ways of earning money, while the discussion of accepting a bad situation is not clearly explained. The point about unregistered factory work is also difficult to connect to either view. To strengthen your response, explain each position directly, give a relevant example such as staying in an unsatisfactory job versus seeking training or another job, and state your opinion clearly from the introduction through the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has separate paragraphs and uses a few linking expressions, including “Furthermore,” “From my perspective,” and “In conclusion,” so there is an attempt to organise the ideas. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because several sentences introduce new points without explaining their connection to the question. For example, the opening moves from living costs to holidays and then to illegal activities, and the factory-work point does not lead clearly into the next idea. References such as “those all worth” and “it” are also unclear. Plan one paragraph for each view, followed by your opinion, and make each sentence develop the paragraph’s main point. Use linking words only where the relationship between ideas is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You try to use vocabulary related to hardship and perseverance, including “crisis,” “goals,” “confidence,” and “proud,” and you attempt some less common expressions such as “natural sights and sounds.” However, basic vocabulary is often inaccurate or unnatural, which makes parts of the message hard to understand. Phrases such as “living funds,” “work invigorating,” “rose benefit,” and “dark member of crime” do not express the intended ideas clearly. Spelling and word-form errors, including “belived,” “worriors,” and “conslusion,” also reduce clarity. Build a reliable set of topic vocabulary and check collocations: for example, use “cost of living,” “main benefit,” and “commit crimes.” Prefer clear, accurate wording over ambitious phrases you are unsure how to use.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to write both simple and longer sentences, using connectors such as “because,” “when,” and “so.” However, sentence structures are very limited in control, and frequent errors sometimes distort meaning. Examples include “Many peoples thought,” “they doing jobs,” and “they wil became,” where subject–verb agreement and verb forms are not controlled. Several sentences also combine clauses without clear grammatical links, as in “When came worse time on individuals so most of the peoles are give up.” Articles, pronouns, and tense choices are inconsistent as well. Practise forming accurate simple sentences first, then join related ideas with one clear subordinate clause. Check that every sentence has a subject and a correctly formed verb, and use punctuation to separate complete ideas.

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