Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often suggested to accept the worse conditions while some argue that it is advantageous to work hard so the situation can be improved. I firmly believe that hard work is a key to success so keep trying until you succeed.

The signifcant number of people believe that you shoud accept the failure with courage and do not blame yourself or others for this lose. If an individual is suffering from shortage of money or unsatisfactory job position, he should not adopt the wrong way for lavish life style. We have seen many cases where people became disheartened or depressed due to the financial or social status and even some of them committed suicide. So it is not the option to end one's life only due to the detrimental situations. Indiviuals must have courage and strength to face the circumstances bravely.

On the paradoxical side, some argue that it is better to work hard and improve the situation rather than feeling depressed and choosing the wrong path. The major point which they discuss in this regard is that hard work is a key to success. God also helps those who help themselves. Any situation can be changed merely by hardwork. As there is a famous quote that try try again until you succeed.

From my perspective, I strongly believe in hard work. I also failed many time but never loose hope. I am strictly committed to my work and one day my hard will pay off. I have seen many individuals who achieve their goals by hard work. Failure is not the end. It is the ladder to your success.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You discuss both positions and state your view clearly: “I firmly believe that hard work is a key to success,” which is maintained in the final paragraph. The examples about financial hardship and people becoming depressed are relevant, and the personal reference to continuing after failure supports your opinion. However, the acceptance viewpoint is mainly presented as having courage and avoiding harmful choices; it does not fully explain why someone might reasonably accept an unsatisfactory job or limited income. The argument for trying to improve circumstances is also asserted through slogans such as “God also helps those who help themselves” rather than developed with a specific explanation or example. Explain the benefits and limits of each approach more fully, and connect examples directly to the question.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a concluding paragraph expressing your opinion. Signposts such as “On the paradoxical side” and “From my perspective” help readers follow the discussion. The progression is generally understandable, but some connections are mechanical or unclear. For example, “The major point which they discuss in this regard” is wordy, and the sequence from financial hardship to suicide needs a clearer link to accepting a bad situation. The final paragraph repeats the idea of hard work without drawing together the two sides. Use more precise referencing and transitions, and make each paragraph develop one connected line of reasoning rather than relying on repeated claims and quotations.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “shortage of money,” “financial or social status,” “disheartened,” and “detrimental situations.” These choices show an attempt to discuss hardship with more than basic language. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “signifcant,” “shoud,” “lose” where “loss” is intended, and “Indiviuals.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “the worse conditions,” “lavish life style,” and “my hard will pay off.” Repeated use of “hard work,” “situation,” and “success” limits variety. Build a more accurate range of collocations for employment and finances, and proofread spelling and word forms so that your meaning is consistently clear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mixture of simple sentences and some longer structures, including the conditional “If an individual is suffering from shortage of money … he should not adopt…” and the clause beginning “where people became disheartened.” Most ideas remain understandable, but errors occur in sentence construction and grammatical forms. For example, “I also failed many time” needs plural agreement, while “never loose hope” uses the wrong verb form; “I am strictly committed to my work and one day my hard will pay off” also lacks a complete, correctly formed expression. The opening sentence has an awkward infinitive construction, and punctuation around the quotation and repeated “try” is not controlled. Practise accurate agreement, verb forms, articles, and complete sentence patterns while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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