Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In today's rapidly evolving world, environment play crucial role individual lives. Moreover, a group of people argue that the vital environmental issue of our time is the loss of different species of plants and animals. However, others discuss that there are significant environment problems. This essay will articulate both of view points along with my own opinion.

To commence with the bright side of the circumstance, as people are more aware to protect environmental plants and animals. To be more precise, environment problems is our problems, every natural particles give some importance minerals. For example, I have 5 cows in my village, these cows milk provide many types of minarals as well as, cows helped to my family in many fields. As a result, natural plants and animals should provide some good things and I suggest that everyone must help to improve our environment.

Furthermore, nowadays, environment problem are main concern, as a result, there are huge amount of plants and animals lossed. To elaborate furthere on this point, in the current time, there are many plants and species loss. Therefore, disturbe our natural circle. For instance, recentlly, the sparrow are loss. though sparrow help to farmers. its catch small harmfull species in farm but, the sparrow species loss in village areas. Consequently, farmers are spry some harmfull products, and harm their farms.

In conclusion, environment is significant in living being. There are some positive ways to environment help peoples such as, provide huge amount of minarals whereas, there are negative side that loss of particular species of plants and animals like environment face lots of diseater issues.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response recognises the topic and gives examples related to species loss, especially the sparrow example, but it does not adequately discuss both views in the question. The first body paragraph focuses on the benefits people receive from nature and protecting plants and animals, rather than explaining why species loss is considered the main environmental problem. The second paragraph mentions species decline and its effects on farmers, but the alternative view—that other environmental problems are more important—is not identified or developed. Your own opinion is also difficult to determine: the introduction promises one, while the conclusion lists positive and negative points without clearly choosing a position. Address each view directly, then state and support your judgement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a recognisable essay structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “For instance” and “In conclusion” help signal stages. However, progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because ideas are loosely connected or the relationship between them is unclear. For example, the first body paragraph moves from awareness of protection to minerals and then to the writer’s cows, without clearly developing a view about the relative importance of species loss. The conclusion also introduces “diseater issues” without explaining the connection. Use topic sentences that directly answer the task, and make each example clearly support the paragraph’s main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some topic-related vocabulary, including “species,” “natural circle,” “farmers” and “harmfull products,” and attempts phrases such as “main concern” and “To elaborate.” However, vocabulary is often basic, repetitive or inaccurately combined, which makes several ideas hard to interpret. Phrases such as “natural particles give some importance minerals,” “plants and animals lossed” and “positive ways to environment help peoples” do not express the intended meaning clearly. Spelling errors, including “minarals,” “furthere” and “recentlly,” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise environmental vocabulary and check collocations and word forms; for example, describe species as “declining” or “becoming extinct,” rather than saying they are “lossed.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, using connectors such as “as a result,” “whereas” and “though.” However, grammatical control is inconsistent, and errors frequently make relationships between ideas unclear. Examples include “environment play crucial role,” “environment problems is our problems,” and “the sparrow are loss,” which show problems with articles, subject–verb agreement and verb forms. Some sentences are incomplete or joined awkwardly, such as “Therefore, disturbe our natural circle” and “For instance, recentlly, the sparrow are loss.” Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement, articles and sentence boundaries. More accurate control of these basic patterns would make your ideas easier to understand.

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