Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is often discussed by people that music is very important to keep humans connected beacuse it help us to show our feelings which can not be explain though normal word. I am completely agree with this point of view that music makes our bond strong.

In my opinion, I believe that music is just a language of love. It not only connect the lovers but also keeps our heart and soul calm by expressing our feelings infront of our loved ones. For intance, Sometimes we feel so bad and nothing make us peacfull so that hurt people just listen the music to get rid of pain that raise in their hearts so it also help us to heal of wounds and fade our pain.

On the other hand, music also create connections with other countries. It show how other people express their love. Every country has their owe taste in music for intance Europeans usually love pop music and Asians prefer calm sounds. That also express their nature.Every country has its own national anthum through which they show their love for country it is also a type of music.

In conclusion, I came to the result that makes our connections stronger but also express our feeling make us happy and keep.our soul healthy by calming it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You state a clear position—“I am completely agree” that music strengthens bonds—and give relevant points about emotional comfort and connections between countries. However, the response only partially develops the question of bringing people of different cultures and ages together: the examples focus mainly on personal feelings and national music, with little explanation of how people of different ages connect. The comparison that Europeans prefer pop and Asians prefer calm sounds is broad and not supported with a specific example. The conclusion also repeats the main idea without fully summarising your reasons. The response is 33 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to explain and support your ideas. Develop each point with a concrete example and a clearer link to the question.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “In my opinion” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader identify your main position and the two areas you discuss. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear. The first body paragraph moves from music as a language of love to pain relief without clearly connecting these ideas to people of different ages or cultures. Some linking phrases, such as “so that” and “it is also,” do not show the relationship between ideas precisely, and the conclusion is difficult to follow. Use topic sentences that directly address the question, then explain each point in a logical sequence. Clearer referencing and transitions would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “expressing our feelings,” “connections,” “national anthem,” and “calm,” and the reader can generally understand your intended meaning. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repeated, particularly “music,” “feelings,” and “connections.” Some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “heal of wounds,” “raise in their hearts,” and “show their nature.” There are also spelling errors, including “beacuse,” “intance,” “peacfull,” and “anthum,” which reduce the accuracy of the writing. Aim for more precise expressions and check spelling carefully. For example, describe music as helping people “cope with emotional pain” or “share cultural traditions,” rather than relying on vague or unnatural phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including the structure “It not only… but also…,” and your main position is usually understandable. However, errors occur frequently in basic sentence patterns and in attempts to join ideas. Examples include “it help us,” “It not only connect,” and “music also create,” where subject–verb agreement is incorrect, as well as “I am completely agree,” which uses an incorrect verb pattern. In “which can not be explain,” the passive form is incomplete. Punctuation also causes problems, particularly the run-on sentence beginning “For intance” and the full stop within “keep.our.” Practise accurate agreement, verb forms, and sentence boundaries before adding more complex structures.

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