Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

In the modern world music is the main part of our lives.Every single person disscussed it and listen to it in every place and all time.

I would like to disagree with this opinion for that the music is a better way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together.

Firstly, many of our people are much interested to listening music but yet they don't take near the individuals of different cultures and ages.Because music is just a feeling that is created in our mind by listen to it.

Secondly, it doesn't matter that origins and thier other people are must be gethered as one only by the music, it depends on the perspectives of the individuals of the cultures.

However,I totallt disagree with this statement many of us are not enjoy music as compared to those who enjoy it.

In conclusion, i want ask that music is nothing and it's haram in our religion ISLAM on the other hand Quran must be a thing that brought people of other cultures and languages crowded.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response takes a position, but it is difficult to identify consistently: you say, “I would like to disagree,” then describe music as “a better way” of bringing people together, and later say you “totallt disagree.” The reasons are brief and do not clearly explain how music fails to connect people across cultures or ages; the point about individual perspectives is relevant but needs an example or further explanation. The conclusion introduces religion and the Quran without showing how this supports your answer to the question. The response contains 165 words, so it is 85 words below the required minimum; the 10 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Develop a consistent position and support it with relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response with an opening, two points introduced by “Firstly” and “Secondly,” a contrasting sentence, and a conclusion. These markers help the reader recognise the intended structure. However, the ideas do not progress clearly: the opening and first-person position conflict, and “However” introduces another disagreement without clarifying how it relates to the preceding points. Some sentences are joined in ways that make their relationships unclear, while the final reference to religion feels disconnected from the discussion. Use one clear position throughout, give each paragraph a distinct purpose, and connect each reason to the question with explicit explanation.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “cultures,” “ages,” “individuals,” and “perspectives,” and you attempt to express abstract ideas about music and connection. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear, such as “take near the individuals,” “origins and thier other people,” and “brought people … crowded.” Spelling errors such as “disscussed,” “totallt,” and “thier” also reduce accuracy. Aim for clear, natural phrases rather than complicated wording: for example, explain whether music encourages people to interact or simply gives them a shared interest. Check spelling and use topic vocabulary precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response includes mostly simple sentence patterns and attempts some longer structures, for example, “Firstly, many of our people are much interested to listening music but yet…” These attempts show an effort to connect clauses, but control is uneven. Errors include “Every single person … listen,” “many of us are not enjoy,” and “music is a better way … together,” where the sentence structure does not clearly express the intended position. There are also missing spaces after full stops and commas, and inconsistent capitalisation. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and verb patterns, such as “are interested in listening” and “do not enjoy,” then build longer sentences around one clear main idea.

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