Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this well developed world, certain individuals are forgetting the sense of traditions.Owing to this, one school of thought believe that music act as a paramount role to make strong bonding between various cultures and ages.According to my perspective, I fully agree with the writer notion.Therefore, I will demonstrate all the supportive reasons of it with appropriate examples and at the end conclusion will be drawn by me.

To commence with, there are plethora of significant aspects of this phenomenon.The most attractive point is the music is the god gifted art which enjoyed by each and every type of people.To elaborate it, in this contemporary era, masses do not have in-depth knowledge of music due to this ones they get chance to learn about it, they straightaway jump on it especially youngsters as well as old age and also all over the globe from different cultures.By attending these events, they will not only get the sharp knowledge of music but also they will get opportunity to interfere with number of people and make them as a friend.In other words,In India, every year, music event organised by authority where they invites foreigners, elders and also adults as a consequently it allow them to get in touch with extreme people with varies age and cultures.

Moreover, there are number of musics around the world which reflects multiple sense such as emotional, traditional, pop and so on.By these kind of music people can meet different people in terms of their taste.For an example,if we attend emotional music organisations, it will emotionally touch with people and the attraction towards other.

In conclusion, music is the worthy thing to bring people from different culture and age as lots of people are enjoying this and it directly touch with heart.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention that music brings people together, the explanation remains repetitive and lacks depth. For instance, the example regarding India is vague, and the explanation of how music 'touches the heart' is not fully explored. To improve, you should provide more specific, concrete examples of how music bridges cultural or generational gaps, rather than relying on general statements. The conclusion is also quite brief and does not effectively synthesize the main points discussed in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical and sometimes inaccurate. Phrases like 'In other words' are used incorrectly, as the following sentence does not paraphrase the previous one but introduces a new example. Additionally, some transitions feel forced, such as 'Therefore, I will demonstrate all the supportive reasons'. The progression of ideas is occasionally disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the logical flow between sentences. Improving the variety and naturalness of linking words will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choices and non-standard collocations, such as 'well developed world' instead of 'modern world', 'god gifted art', and 'interfere with number of people' (which actually means to hinder or meddle). You rely on basic descriptors and repetitive phrasing. To reach a higher band, focus on learning topic-specific collocations and using more precise academic vocabulary to express your ideas clearly and naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'music act as', 'music is the god gifted art which enjoyed'), incorrect article usage, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'ones they get chance'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing after commas. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and basic sentence construction.

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