Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
People from different cultures appreciate music regardless of their without age discrimination. Ages group of individuals together its bring positive atmosphere to them. I totally agree with it music is one of best way for brings everyone to together. Music gives deep meaning about the cultures its depends on creator of music. Some melodies create positive emotions to the public, some music explain our history.
Especially, In villages they give more important to traditional folk music by their native languages. In traditional, Cultural time they celebrate festival must with music, also by sanskrit slokas ancient time now everyone reading it as music to understand the meaning some words in sanskrit really hard to speak but by music it is easy way to go on flow because muisc has rythm to understand. Sometime history can preserve history by music. Example: Bonalu-Jathara in Telangana, Dasara festival celebration in vijayawada from People of all ages, from children to senior citizens, gather together and celebrates festival by music.
On the hand, now a days many people are busy with they works may be it is office or personal works no time to go out, gathering. At weekendsThey attend Rama Japa concerts conducted by Iscon to make stress relief, emotional connection, Enjoying they self also understands our culture spirits with meaning by going concerts. This kind of concerts there is no age required everyone can participate and allow.
In Conclusion, My opinion is musical traditions is a beautiful language even kids also understands. There is no language barrier in music if it good, giving good vibe everyone support & celebrate it as festival.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear agreement with the idea that music brings people together. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While you provide relevant examples like Bonalu-Jathara and Rama Japa concerts, the explanation of these points is often hindered by unclear phrasing, such as 'Ages group of individuals together its bring positive atmosphere'. The connection between music and cultural preservation is mentioned but not fully explored in a cohesive manner. To improve, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed argument that directly supports your position, rather than listing examples with limited analysis.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression between sentences is frequently disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Especially' and 'On the hand', but they are often used incorrectly or mechanically. Referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of your argument. For example, the transition between the discussion of traditional music and the mention of modern concerts is abrupt. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each sentence clearly relates to the previous one will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive, with frequent errors in word choice and collocation that occasionally impede meaning. For instance, phrases like 'without age discrimination' and 'cultural time' are used in ways that do not sound natural. While you attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'traditional folk music' and 'language barrier', the overall range is insufficient to convey complex ideas with precision. To reach a higher band, focus on learning collocations—words that naturally go together—and try to incorporate a wider variety of descriptive adjectives and precise verbs to express your thoughts more clearly.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('music is one of best way for brings'), sentence structure, and punctuation. Many sentences are fragmented or run-on, which makes them difficult to parse. There is a limited range of complex structures, and attempts to use them often result in errors that can cause confusion. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject and verb. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect verb tenses will also help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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