Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

I absolutely agree with those who tell that the music can unite various people around the world, because the music raise topics which are familiar to everyone and the musical events can gather people from the different countries.

First of all, many famous musical compositions are about very widespread problems or the usual life aspects. There are lots of songs about love, friendship, or social problems, such as poverty, war, social inequality. If the person listens to the music on the familiar topic, he is likely to experience emotions, which he wants to share with other people. Thus, people around the world connect with each other in the comments under the clips of famous songs. For example, there is the Phil Collins's song 'Another Day in Paradise' which he wrote under the impression of his trip to the USA where he was shocked by lots of homeless people on the streets. Its videoclip on YouTube gained hundreds of millions views of people who share the author's views about poverty and who connected with each other.

Second of all, people can unite on the big musical events. There are lots of big concerts around the world almost each year where people come from the different parts of the world. They just like to listen to music and spend time and share emotions with other people regardless of their nationality or age. For example, the Live Aid in 1985 gained millions of people from different countries in the UK and US, succeding in collecting millions of dollars on the help to people in Africa.

In conclusion, I truly believe that the music is the phenomenon which can unite people around the world regardless of their differences. The main reasons for it are topics which people around the world understand and big musical events which became the global cultural occasions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response clearly addresses the prompt and maintains a consistent position throughout. The ideas are relevant, with specific examples provided for both arguments: the universal nature of musical themes and the impact of large-scale musical events. The development is logical, though the explanation of how online comments foster connection could be slightly more nuanced to reach a higher band. Overall, the response is well-focused and directly answers the question regarding the extent to which music brings people together.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'First of all', 'Thus', 'For example', and 'In conclusion' are used effectively to guide the reader. Paragraphing is appropriate, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct central idea. While the flow is generally smooth, some transitions could be more sophisticated to avoid a slightly mechanical feel. However, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning clearly. There is an attempt to use topic-specific language such as 'musical compositions', 'social inequality', and 'global cultural occasions'. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'gain hundreds of millions views' (should be 'gain hundreds of millions of views') and 'succeding in collecting' (should be 'succeeding in collecting'). While the range is adequate, more precise or idiomatic expressions would be needed to reach a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are recurring grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the music', 'the Phil Collins's song') and subject-verb agreement ('the music raise', 'the music is the phenomenon'). Punctuation is generally accurate, but the frequent misuse of the definite article 'the' before abstract nouns or general concepts slightly detracts from the overall fluency. Despite these errors, the grammar does not impede communication.

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