Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-22
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
A number of individuals believe that to bring people together of different cultures and ages music can be a optimal option. I also agree with this notion as music is enjoyed by every age group and society. I will elaborate my points of view in the upcoming paragraphs.
The primary reason, behind how music can help to unite the people of different culture and ages together as it is widely acknowledge that music is enjoy by everyone and every where so when music is played on parties or any occassion that time everyone come on stage and enjoy whole moment together. So, music plays an important role to bring people together.
Moving further, music also help to erase the line between ages when music played on any festival or ritual on that time everyone dance by forgetting their age people from all ages enjoy and dance on music like music is written by different customs and religions so in order to pay respect to others religion people enjoy music.
In conclusion, music assists individuals to enjoy every moment and also help to reduce between ages and cultures music holds great importance.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 191 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas, which remain superficial and repetitive. While you clearly state your position in the introduction, the supporting arguments lack depth and specific examples. The points made about music at parties or festivals are generic and do not fully explore the 'extent' of the argument. To improve, you must expand your body paragraphs with detailed explanations and concrete examples to ensure the task is fully addressed as per the requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the progression of ideas is limited by the brevity of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'The primary reason' and 'Moving further', but they are somewhat mechanical. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the conclusion where the phrase 'reduce between ages' is grammatically incomplete and lacks a clear object. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence flows logically into the next, rather than relying on simple transitions.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is adequate for basic communication but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. You rely on simple, repetitive phrasing such as 'bring people together' and 'enjoy'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'optimal option' and 'whole moment'. To achieve a higher score, you should aim to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary and idiomatic expressions related to the topic of culture and social cohesion. Avoid repeating the same words and phrases throughout the essay.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'music can be a optimal option' (article error), 'music is enjoy by everyone' (passive voice error), and 'help to reduce between ages' (missing object/incomplete thought). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and subject-verb agreement before attempting more complex grammatical forms. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles and verb tense consistency is essential.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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