Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Most of the people say that music is a best way of taking people of others cultures and ages together.
Now, i am agree about this statement .
let's talk about the topic , According to my knowledge most of the people like different taste of music. Usually many people like new songs whose heal him and help him to change his mood.I think when we play music many aged of people will come and joined us. Most of the people play music to reduce boredom of daily life . Man has keep on working the whole day he need an enjoyable activity to reduce his boredom. most of the people play music and some people watch the cultures story's. For example , Student can work whole day and he need any activity to change his mood he sing song or play the songs this help him to change his mood and he started his study again without any mood swing. Music has the power to connect people of different ages .In families parents and children may have different interests,but they often come together to enjoy music at weddings,festivals and family gathering .A classic example is how older generations enjoy traditional folk songs while younger people prefer modern remixes,yet both groups can appreciate music together during celebrations.Moreover,schools and community events frequently use music to encourage cooperation between students and elderly volunteers.
IN conclusion,I strongly believe that music is a powerful tool for bringing people together regardless of culture music or age .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear position in favor of music as a unifying force. The ideas are relevant, particularly the examples regarding family gatherings and community events. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The initial paragraph is repetitive, focusing heavily on 'boredom' and 'mood' rather than the core theme of cultural and age-related unity. While the second half of the essay provides better support, the overall depth of analysis is limited. To reach a higher band, you should focus on expanding your arguments with more specific, nuanced examples rather than repeating the same points about personal mood.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or slightly awkward, such as the transition 'let's talk about the topic'. Some sentences feel disconnected, and the flow between ideas could be smoother. The referencing is occasionally unclear, and the paragraphing is somewhat imbalanced, with a very short introduction and a long, dense body paragraph. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'good way', 'like', and 'play music' repeatedly. There are also some word-choice errors, such as 'many aged of people' and 'cultures story's', which sound unnatural. While you attempt some topic-specific vocabulary like 'traditional folk songs' and 'modern remixes', the overall lexical range is limited. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms and collocations to express your ideas with greater clarity and variety.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('Most of the people say', 'Man has keep on working'), incorrect article usage, and punctuation errors (e.g., spacing around commas and periods). The sentence 'whose heal him and help him' is grammatically incorrect. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent verb tenses would be a beneficial next step.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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