Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. In this essay , i will discuss about this topic and i also provide my opinion .
On the one hand , some people are agree from this opinion . I also agree from this opinion because their are some examples which show that this opinion is right . Firstly , when some people listen songs than they fill very happy and less stress . Secondly , if we play music than all people do enjoy and fell better while they are different culture . For example , one day i travel in bus than driver play a hindi music and they get their volume high than i see that in bus their are all types of people of different culture and different ages they all fell the song and they also sing song with each other and this is very happy moment for everyone . This example show that music are good way to bringing people of different cultures and ages together.
On other hand , some people disagree from this opinion because their are some facts that illustrate this opinion . Some people like different types of songs like teenager enjoy trending songs and old people like old songs of different singers like chamkila etc. So this example show that music cannot bringing people of different culture together.
to conclude, people have their own opinion on this topic and i think we should favour opinion that music is good way of bringing people of different culture together .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing whether music brings people together. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments are repetitive and rely on personal anecdotes rather than broader analysis. For instance, the example of the bus driver is too specific and does not effectively support the claim regarding cultural and age-related unity. The position is clear, but the reasoning lacks depth, and the counter-argument is underdeveloped, failing to provide a balanced perspective. To improve, you should focus on explaining 'why' and 'how' music acts as a universal language, rather than just stating that it makes people happy.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay uses basic cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'On the one hand'. However, these are often used mechanically, and the flow between sentences is frequently disrupted by grammatical errors. Paragraphing is present, but the internal logic within the paragraphs is weak. For example, the transition from the argument about happiness to the bus anecdote is abrupt. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the overall progression of ideas is hindered by the repetitive nature of the arguments. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each sentence logically follows the previous one will help improve the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, often relying on basic words like 'good', 'happy', and 'people'. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'are agree from this opinion' instead of 'agree with this opinion' and 'fill very happy' instead of 'feel very happy'. The range is insufficient to express complex ideas, and the misuse of words occasionally impedes clarity. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your range of vocabulary to include more precise terms related to social cohesion, cultural diversity, and emotional impact, while paying closer attention to correct word forms and collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that affect the readability of the text. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement ('music are good way'), verb tense usage ('when some people listen songs than they fill'), and article usage. Sentence structures are predominantly simple, and attempts at complex sentences are often marred by errors in syntax and punctuation. For example, 'if we play music than all people do enjoy and fell better while they are different culture' is grammatically incorrect and confusing. You need to focus on mastering basic sentence construction and subject-verb agreement before attempting more complex structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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