Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
yes i agreed that music is a good way or sources of bringing people of different cultures and ages together because songs written in English , Hindi, Punjabi , Behari, Haryanvi and so on in many other languages . to connect the people of different cultures like British, Behar, Haryana , Punjab and so on . songs are listened by all ages . their are many songs which is listen by small children . many songs are written on festivals like Onam , Holi . In India , Lohri festivals also have traditional song . aged people listen song of their own period like 90s, 80s song . and now these songs are recreated by other people at present because they said old is gold . young people listening the songs according to their vibes . songs like Bairan which is written in Haryanvi language and also sing in the Haryanvi language is very popular in young boys and girls in all over India.
In India songs which is sing and write in English languages also get famous among youngsters . due to this reasons i agreed to this line that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. age people and young people listen the songs even old and new .
music helps us to compete with our sadness, depressions thoughts . soft music also fresh our mind . fresh our thoughts . some music are also written for meditation purpose and some for dance purpose.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear position in favor of music as a unifying force. However, the development of ideas is limited. While you provide examples of different languages and age groups, the explanation remains superficial. For instance, mentioning specific regional festivals like 'Onam' or 'Lohri' is relevant, but the connection to how these bridge cultural gaps is not fully explored. The essay tends to list examples rather than analyzing the underlying reasons for music's unifying power. To improve, you should focus on developing each main point with more depth and ensuring the argument is consistently supported throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into three paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and repetitive; for example, the frequent use of 'and' and 'many' to connect ideas makes the flow mechanical. There is a lack of clear transition between the discussion of culture and the discussion of age. Furthermore, the final paragraph introduces new ideas about mental health and meditation that are not clearly linked to the main argument about cultural and generational unity. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly enhance the coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, which limits your ability to express complex ideas. You rely heavily on simple terms like 'good', 'songs', and 'people'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'compete with our sadness' (instead of 'cope with') and 'fresh our mind' (instead of 'refresh'). While you attempt to use some specific terminology related to music and culture, the overall range is insufficient for a higher band score. To improve, focus on learning synonyms for common words and practicing collocations to ensure your language sounds more natural and precise.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'songs is listen' and 'music... fresh our mind'. Punctuation is also problematic, with spaces before commas and periods throughout the text. The sentence structures are mostly simple, with very few successful attempts at complex sentences. The errors in verb tense and pluralization are pervasive. To reach a higher band, you must focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring subject-verb agreement, and practicing the correct use of punctuation and complex sentence structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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