Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In a contemporary society, the music industry has emerged as a highly debated issue. While a segment of people claim that it has led to a higher impact on society, others strongly oppose this notion. From my viewpoint, I firmly agree with the given notion, as it offers a multitude of significant advantages.

To commence with, the compelling reason for supporting my viewpoint is that every culture has its own style of composing music. People are mostly inspired from it because it leads to share the strong bond among individuals. When singers compose the music, they show a prosperity and significant value of their heritage, which attracts the people's attention, and they listen the song wholeheartedly. For instance, when a new song is released in the industry, it spreads to every nook of a country, and listeners share their feelings of emotions and joy with each other. Therefore, it has a significant value in our homeland.

Another noteworthy justification is that each musical piece carries a valuable message, whether in the form of performing in the world cups or in the film industry. When stage shows are organized, people come widely from all over the world in order to reduce their anxiety so that they can listen it in the presence of fresh mind. For example, world's famous song nowadays is the FIFA World Cup, which is composed by a renowned singer Shakira; it has broken the record by gaining reputations from the public as a large amount of society joined with her to cheer on the day. Hence, all ages are greatly influenced by the melodies and entertain themselves in a very good way.

To sum up, it will be the derogatory for the music industry to put them down in respect of bringing people of different cultures and ages together because this industry has done a lot of struggle to break the ice in the world because whenever a music word comes, people come closer to enjoy the moment and show respect to others.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of music as a unifying force. The ideas are relevant, such as the cultural heritage aspect and the role of global events like the FIFA World Cup. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The explanation of how music brings different ages together is quite thin, relying on general statements rather than specific, well-supported arguments. While the position is clear throughout, the supporting points could be more deeply explored to reach a higher band. The conclusion is a bit repetitive and slightly off-topic in its phrasing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence with', 'Another noteworthy justification', and 'To sum up', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical or slightly misused, such as 'it will be the derogatory for the music industry'. The flow between sentences is generally clear, but the referencing is occasionally imprecise, which creates minor confusion in the progression of ideas. Overall, the structure is coherent, but the use of cohesive devices lacks the flexibility required for a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'contemporary', 'nook', and 'derogatory', but some of these are used incorrectly or in unnatural collocations (e.g., 'it will be the derogatory for the music industry'). There are also minor issues with word choice, such as 'listen the song' instead of 'listen to the song'. While the range is sufficient to convey meaning, the lack of precision and occasional awkward phrasing limit the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'it leads to share the strong bond' (should be 'it leads to the sharing of a strong bond') and 'people come widely from all over the world'. Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are issues with article usage and verb patterns. The errors are noticeable but do not significantly impede communication. To improve, the student should focus on subject-verb agreement and more accurate use of complex sentence structures.

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