Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In contemporary world, the most of the people are almost forgetting their roots and culture. Preserving the cultural heritage helps people to remember their history and tradtion . Music serves as a cultural preservance and it can help people to live a unity. I totally agree with the statement that music can help in bringing people of different cultures and ages together.

Many individuals have migrated in search of better carier opportunities.However,they are almost forgetting their history and culture.Moreover,to solve this issue music can work in a effective manner.Music acts as an therapy for individuals.Additionally,it can help people to relax . Music differs from country to country and culture to culture, it can act as an better step for bringing people together. To illustrate, if there is music concert in any country it can help joining people from different countries together.Moreover,it helps in building the unity among the individuals of different generations.Furthermore,people start respecting each others cultural heritages,which automatically generates sense of belongingness between each other.

On the other hand music acts as an mental and emotional therapy for many individuals. Peolpe not only tries to understand the lyrics of the song but also come about the value of music.Meanwhile,music is not linked to the songs only,it also include musical instruments.These insrtuments also has there own unique indentity and value.For example,if any young adult wants to learn how to play the device,he or she will only go to a expert utor. Additionaly, which will develop a sense of respect in them and it will eventually lead in bringing young and adults together. Mostly, people love to listen english music however,some individuals are unable to understand the meaning of the long ,but it will help people to develop their friend circle.For example, people can talk to each through the social media applications, which will help them in developing groups.

In conclusion,music plays a very vital role in todays time. It helps in developing unity among youngsters and adults. Therefore, goverment should organise seminars related to music,also concerts , so that people can meet each other from different communities and develop a sense of belongingness among them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing how music brings people of different cultures and ages together, presenting a clear overall position of agreement. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the introduction of cultural preservation and migration is relevant, some points are under-developed or drift into tangential claims, such as the therapeutic effects of music or learning to play an instrument from an expert tutor, which do not directly or fully substantiate how music unites different ages and cultures. To move to a higher level, the writer needs to extend and support all main arguments with deeper elaboration and more focused examples rather than relying on general assertions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance presented in the introduction and a concluding summary. Paragraphing is utilised to divide distinct ideas, such as cultural migration in the second body paragraph and generational connections in the third. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing is occasionally unclear. Words and phrases like 'Moreover', 'Additionally', and 'Furthermore' are heavily relied upon to link sentences, creating a formulaic progression. Additionally, internal referencing within paragraphs sometimes falters, such as 'if any young adult wants to learn how to play the device', where the antecedent is ambiguous. Improving the flexibility of cohesive devices and ensuring smoother logical transitions between sentences would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used provides an adequate range for the task, allowing the writer to convey basic ideas about culture, migration, and unity. The response attempts less common vocabulary items such as 'contemporary world', 'cultural heritage', and 'belongingness', but these attempts are frequently marred by word choice, collocation, and spelling errors. For instance, 'cultural preservance' should be 'cultural preservation', 'carier opportunities' contains a spelling error, and 'acts as an therapy' contains an article error relating to vocabulary context. Furthermore, phrases like 'developing their friend circle' are somewhat informal. To achieve a higher score, the writer must expand their vocabulary range and exercise greater precision in word formation, collocation, and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The text displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt to vary grammatical structures. However, there is a persistent presence of grammatical errors throughout the response. These include errors in articles ('the most of the people', 'an effective manner'), pluralisation and agreement ('These insrtuments also has there own', 'understand the meaning of the long'), and prepositions or phrase patterns ('talk to each through the social media'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur regularly enough to restrict the score. To improve, the writer should focus on mastering basic agreement, article usage, and ensuring that complex sentence structures remain grammatically accurate.

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