Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A bunch of people believes that music is a effective way to bring people of different cultures and ages together. I completely agree with this statement in the following paragraphs reasons and explanation will be discussed in support of my opinion.

Music has been in our cultures from ancient times as it has been proven to be an effective method of celebrating, uplifting mood and to unite people. No matter what the background of the individual is the rythmes and tune always turns out to make people move. Additionally, there has been a lot of researches about music of ancient time that how people at that time used to play and celebrate occassions. It always turns out be a group activity involving individuals of various age groups. Thus proving music as a way to bring people together.

In contemporary times, music has developed on a large scale giving birth to different styles of music like jazz, rock, heavy metal, techno and many more. Moreover, some of it such as techno does not involve lyrics consisting majorly rythmes and tunes which make people move regardless of there culture, age or language. Therefore, music like techno is being used in parties and other international parties to make people feel stress free and enjoy.

For instance, in Macloadganj situated in Himachal Pardesh there is are lot of Israeli cafe which plays certain type of music to make people feel calm and connected.

In conclusion, music has always been an effective method to celebrate any event or ceremony from ancient times till now and will be in future. Variations have been made still people enjoy music and it's rythmes.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, presenting a clear position agreeing that music brings different cultures and ages together. Relevant ideas are introduced, such as the historical significance of music in group celebrations and modern genres like techno transcending language and cultural barriers. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For instance, the mention of techno music in international parties is somewhat superficial, and the local example from Himachal Pradesh is underdeveloped and lacks sufficient detail to fully support the argument. To move to a higher level, the writer needs to extend and support all main points with deeper elaboration and more thoroughly integrated examples rather than relying on brief assertions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used to separate distinct ideas, such as historical perspectives versus contemporary trends. However, cohesion at times feels mechanical or faulty. The transition between the introduction and the first body paragraph is abrupt, as the promised outline ("in the following paragraphs reasons and explanation will be discussed") is a stock phrase that disrupts logical flow. Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, and some cohesive devices are awkwardly deployed. To achieve a higher standard, the writer should ensure smoother logical transitions between sentences and paragraphs and use referencing words more naturally without relying on formulaic expressions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and specific music genres such as "jazz, rock, heavy metal, techno". However, there are noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling that reflect a limited level of control. Examples include "a effective" instead of "an effective", "rythmes" instead of "rhythms", "occassions" instead of "occasions", and "there culture" instead of "their culture". Furthermore, awkward phrasings like "uplifting mood" detract from precision. To improve lexical scores, the writer needs to expand control over less common lexical items, ensure correct word forms, and eliminate frequent spelling and collocation errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting relative clauses and participial phrases. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text. Subject-verb agreement is weak in the opening sentence, where "A bunch of people believes" should be "believe". Article usage is inconsistent, and prepositions within grammatical patterns are occasionally mishandled, such as in "music of ancient time that how people at that time used to play". Punctuation errors, including missing commas and apostrophes (e.g., "it's rythmes" instead of "its rhythms"), also occur. To progress, the writer must increase control over complex sentence structures and reduce the frequency of basic grammatical slips.

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