Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Since long time, people consider music as an excellent way to gather people. I believe that music really helps people to team up together even if people are from various cultures and different ages. In this essay, I will discuss how music brings people together from different ages and culture.

On one hand, there are so many cultures and they have their own traditional music. Only in India, there are more than 29 states with unique culture and music. Although, India's people speak more than 18 languages where everyone cannot understand it however, when it comes to music people start teaming up. I believe, music has no language and that is the biggest reason it brings people together. During marriage season you can see people dancing with each other, forgetting their age. Even we can see clubs and casino where people dance together on music without knowing the people.

On the other hand, I also believe that music has a different kind of vibe which people feel and automatically this help them to connect with each other. Last year, one of my colleague went to Kerala, India. People of Kerala usually speak Malayalam language which is very difficult to understand however, he started dancing with those Malayali people on Malayali song during trekking. He saw me a video where he was dancing on different music with elders and senior citizens without understanding the lyrics.

In conclusion, music does not have any language. Moreover music is a feeling which brings people together from various cultures and ages. I extremely agree with the given statement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address the question directly and maintain a clear, strong position: music can unite people across cultures and ages, and you state that you “extremely agree.” The examples about India’s linguistic diversity, dancing at weddings, and your colleague in Kerala are relevant and help illustrate your view. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, the claim that music “has no language” could be qualified by explaining how rhythm, shared enjoyment, or performance can overcome language differences. The wedding and club examples also focus mainly on people dancing together, with limited explanation of how this creates connection across age groups. Develop these links more explicitly and extend each example to show why it supports your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the ideas generally remain relevant to the topic. The contrastive opening “On one hand” and “On the other hand” helps signal paragraph changes, while the examples give the discussion some progression. However, the two body paragraphs do not clearly develop distinct aspects of the argument: both mainly repeat that music brings people together. Some linking is mechanical, and connections within sentences are occasionally unclear, as in “Although, India's people speak more than 18 languages where everyone cannot understand it however.” The conclusion also repeats the central claim rather than drawing together the examples. Use clearer links between each example and its main point, and organise the body around separate reasons.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate your ideas, including “traditional music,” “cultures,” “lyrics,” and “elders and senior citizens.” The examples also allow you to use relevant terms such as “Malayalam” and “languages.” However, several expressions are imprecise or unnatural, which limits the flexibility and accuracy of the vocabulary. For example, “team up together” is not a natural way to describe social connection, and “a different kind of vibe” is informal and vague for an academic essay. “During marriage season” and “on different music” are also awkward collocations. Aim for more precise academic phrasing and check common word partnerships; this will make your meaning clearer without requiring unusually advanced vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “Although” and “which,” and your meaning is generally understandable. Some sentences are controlled, such as “He saw me a video where he was dancing … with elders and senior citizens,” though this example also shows that sentence patterns need closer checking. There are some errors in articles, agreement, tense and sentence construction: “Since long time” needs an article and a different preposition, “this help them” does not agree with its subject, and “Although” is incorrectly combined with “however” in the same construction. Punctuation around introductory phrases is also inconsistent. Practise building accurate complex sentences and review subject–verb agreement, articles and clause connections.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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